Listening to : Awake - Secondhand Serenade.
Mood : Upset.

"I'd yearned for my own Love Story."
This is going to sound like a typical childish post, perhaps.

Like, a lot of people I knew had thought about their sweet fairytale endings.

"And they lived happily ever after." Sounds familiar?

Frankly, since I was a kid, I'd never believed in stuff like these. It just doesn't make any sense at all.

Now that I'm 15, close to the so-called Sweet Sixteen in a matter of months, the hormones ARE raging inside me, and I can't help but wonder at these statements my friends or people I know made.

Most of my friends that I know are hopelessly head over heels in love with a particular someone.

And most of these friends are my guy friends that I'd known over the years.

It's difficult you know, that all of these guys go to me at any moment of the day to tell me how perfect / gorgeous / smart / pretty / clever / amazing / wonderful / talented / nice / sweet / lovely (and the list goes on) their crush is. Everything about their dream girl seems faultless in their eyes. They'd always asked me questions regarding their love life, and being the tolerant me, I'd always tried my very best to help.

Maybe it's just puppy love, but still..

Honestly, I feel broken inside.

I mean, these girls all are so lucky, not knowing how loyal these friends of mine are, acting all silly over them, but they act not knowing of their existence.

I mean..it's just plain cruel, somehow.

Reality is never sweet anyway.

I admit, I do feel the tinge of jealousy getting up to me. Like, no guy I'd know so far throws compliments like these to me. LOL. I'm ridiculous, I know. Why would a guy ever say these compliments directly to the girl's face?

But, that's not the point.

Besides..two of them had actually liked me before. Even though I'd never liked them back the same way, but somehow, it just hurts to see them fall for another girl, and expecting me to be their Cupid whenever they need me.

Who are they, you might ask?

All I can tell you, one of them is a complete pain in the arse, another is now somebody close to a soul brother, I can say.

Still, being the girl who doesn't know how to decline to her friends' requests, I'll still offer my help.

I'll just have to pray that I won't lose my temper or control of my emotions while taking up the task of being the Love Doctor.

I'm already receiving the love of my friends.
And to you guys, I heart you all.
Without y'all, life wouldn't be what it is now.

But, would I be too greedy to ask this question and require an answer for it..?

"Will there be someone..
to stay awake for her..?"

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It’s not an English name I came up with for myself. My mother is indeed a genius in coming up with such a splendid name for me. Although my name has been unfortunately mutilated (nicknames are excluded) over the past years, full credits to my mum for my current identity.

I’m certainly looking forward to changing the word ‘patient’ to ‘survivor’! If you’re interested to read about my journey in battling lymphoma, you can click here to proceed to my cancer blog.

Ironic, I know; this blog is mainly pink instead. I like all colours actually, but I find myself having an affinity to the colour green. In fact, I can safely say that green is my soul colour.

Languages, music, fashion, photography, cultures, dance, literature, writing; just about anything, really. The arts truly intrigue me, especially thought-provoking pieces. Of course, the arts play a major role in inspiring me in my everyday life.

I don’t have a favourite genre – I read any book that interests me!

I am a trained right-hander from young, since apparently being left-handed is considered ‘wrong’. Basically, I’m ambidextrous! No wonder I find it easier to air guitar using my left hand than my right; I simply relate to the arts than subjects that deal with logical thinking better, too.

A stubborn Bull I am, too. I abhor being rushed. I prefer doing matters at my own reasonable pace. I don’t particularly like changes in my routine, but I can adapt quite easily. I’m a very practical person as well. I enjoy the beautiful things in life, but that doesn’t make me shun ugliness at all. Besides, it all depends on how one perceives beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

Still am, but I’m slowly learning to accept imperfection into my life. Also, I’m doing my best to erase the many expectations I have so I could one day master the art of letting go and freeing myself to simple happiness and joy.

Compared to before, I’m less dramatic nowadays. Language-wise, I attempt to blog flawlessly in English and speak proper English online with my peers. Call me a Grammar Nazi all you want, but that’s how I roll. I only converse in perfect English in formal situations and during my dramatic outbursts. Otherwise, I’m absolutely capable of communicating like the average Malaysian!

It’s a different issue altogether when you’re forced to learn for the sake of getting good grades, though. Other than that, I’m open to new information and knowledge anytime! I especially would like to learn more languages and pick up new musical instruments.

…are just some of the things I would love to do in the near future, hopefully!

the basic rules apply. If you respect me, I’ll respect you. If you happen to be someone who has low EQ skills, I’ll try to be tolerant but my patience is definitely limited. I’m observant when it comes to human behaviour. I’m a person of many opinions, but I don’t voice them out unless I trust you enough; I’m very honest and candid when it comes to the people I can trust. Even though I trust very easily, not everybody can prove that they’re all that nice. Hurt me, and I’ll only defend myself if necessary. Hurt my family or my friends – you won’t find me holding back.

Is there anything else you would like to know about me?
Throw me your questions and/or doubts here! I honestly have nothing to hide, so you’ll expect the truth and nothing but the truth.

It’s only how I phrase my answers that you’ll have to be aware of.
Or…you can click hereto go back to reading!

Listening to : Awake - Secondhand Serenade.
Mood : Upset.

"I'd yearned for my own Love Story."
This is going to sound like a typical childish post, perhaps.

Like, a lot of people I knew had thought about their sweet fairytale endings.

"And they lived happily ever after." Sounds familiar?

Frankly, since I was a kid, I'd never believed in stuff like these. It just doesn't make any sense at all.

Now that I'm 15, close to the so-called Sweet Sixteen in a matter of months, the hormones ARE raging inside me, and I can't help but wonder at these statements my friends or people I know made.

Most of my friends that I know are hopelessly head over heels in love with a particular someone.

And most of these friends are my guy friends that I'd known over the years.

It's difficult you know, that all of these guys go to me at any moment of the day to tell me how perfect / gorgeous / smart / pretty / clever / amazing / wonderful / talented / nice / sweet / lovely (and the list goes on) their crush is. Everything about their dream girl seems faultless in their eyes. They'd always asked me questions regarding their love life, and being the tolerant me, I'd always tried my very best to help.

Maybe it's just puppy love, but still..

Honestly, I feel broken inside.

I mean, these girls all are so lucky, not knowing how loyal these friends of mine are, acting all silly over them, but they act not knowing of their existence.

I mean..it's just plain cruel, somehow.

Reality is never sweet anyway.

I admit, I do feel the tinge of jealousy getting up to me. Like, no guy I'd know so far throws compliments like these to me. LOL. I'm ridiculous, I know. Why would a guy ever say these compliments directly to the girl's face?

But, that's not the point.

Besides..two of them had actually liked me before. Even though I'd never liked them back the same way, but somehow, it just hurts to see them fall for another girl, and expecting me to be their Cupid whenever they need me.

Who are they, you might ask?

All I can tell you, one of them is a complete pain in the arse, another is now somebody close to a soul brother, I can say.

Still, being the girl who doesn't know how to decline to her friends' requests, I'll still offer my help.

I'll just have to pray that I won't lose my temper or control of my emotions while taking up the task of being the Love Doctor.

I'm already receiving the love of my friends.
And to you guys, I heart you all.
Without y'all, life wouldn't be what it is now.

But, would I be too greedy to ask this question and require an answer for it..?

"Will there be someone..
to stay awake for her..?"

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