And yes, 10 things I want to do sometime soon (I hope) :

1. Update my Friendster profile, MySpace profile, Deviantart profile, Facebook profile, Imeem profile, in any case almost everything I signed up for. I think maybe Tagged and Hi5 too, but I never logged in to these two since I really don't know when.

2. Start studying. It's PMR for gooseness sake. Not as important as SPM of course, but still, it determines the stream I'm entering in Form 4, and I'm aiming for Science stream of course, like duh, everybody does, except does who are going for a career that's related to Arts.

3. Update my MP3 player with new songs.

4. DIY my royal gold coloured notebook into a feisty leopard covered skin. Time to be fierce and stay strong in the jiggy jungle. And I just need a sort of motivator as my organizer, and this would do great, if I can ever find time. Sigh.

5. Update my blog with the pictures I took with stuff I bought from MPO. Ah yes, and practise my photography skills, which includes Photoshop. And I want to do something with the stuff I bought from Wanda. Like soon. Maybe during the August holidays? I'll go caliente mad by then.

6. Try out Vlogging. No harm right?

7. Make a blogskin of my own. But hey, I really like my current blogskin, it really represents part of the real me, and it's really simple, neat yet classy too. I'll just have to figure out a nicer one.

8. Finish up all the books that I bought, I think there are over 20 of them I had bought over the year but still have not started reading. Secondary school is really killing my time to read like last time. And that reminds me, I really want to buy and read, of course, the latest book in the Clique series and a new one called The Poseurs.

9. Live, laugh and love. So typical of me, harhar.

And last but not least.

10. Start a new life as me, myself and I, fully with not a single bit of fakeness. I need some heart-to-heart talk with myself and get myself cleared up.

And hoyeah babeh, this girl is gonna make an outstanding comeback in life! XD

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Agonized because I'm making the people who really care about me worried about me. A LOT.

Petrified because I AM petrified. The very same people that are around me are, too.

I am making these people worry over me.

They take my problems as their problems.

They let me rant and go on and on about my very redundant life. And listen too.

They cried with me when I was going through the hardest times of my journey through this evil yet as real as can be - reality.

I won't talk about my parents. They care, only they don't really make it really obvious. Which makes me misunderstand about them the whole time but, yeah, I'm learning.

Today, the wonderful spotlight goes to my piano teacher.

At first, I thought today was gonna be a class that's the same like the previous classes. Bang bang bang the keys, talk talk talk, correct mistakes and give comments, the like.

But, I finally broke down in front of her today.

Yes, I'm actually freak afraid I can't pass my practical for piano this year.

Unknown fact about this blogger - I really need to get the best grades possible for my piano exams so that I can be a certified piano teacher to get some extra duckets for my family, and nobody's pressuring me to get a distinction for a must, instead I'm pushing myself to go for the best. (I guess this is what SIGS does partly to you, harhar.) It's not like we're loaded you know, there's tons of finances to think about, and I wanna help lighten this burden for my parents, by earning my own pocket money to fund myself, while they can use that amount of money to settle more important issues.

I already failed last year, and I never realized it, but I'm actually traumatized by my past experience of sitting for my Grade 5 practical and failed for playing something I did not.

I understand that luck plays a part in the grading too, but I just couldn't believe I was just THAT unlucky.

I had really depended on pure luck for the past 15 years of my life, I actually found myself pretty lucky indeed.

But till last year, not anymore.

She really counselled me about the whole issue, and she cried too.

I'm sorry I made her cried.

But it wasn't as bad as me. And hoyeah, I seriously do not cry a lot. I never believed in the concept of crying. I always thought it makes me look weak, and the always paranoid me am always afraid that everybody in this world would find it easy to manipulate me and look down on my abilities.

Till this year that is, I now know crying is a way to release some bottled-up emotions.

A mucho gracias to her for being there for me, and for believing in me. I'll seriously find time, even if I have to practise in the middle of the night to make you proud of me. And to let you know you're not wrong in having faith in me.

*****And yes, I realized I'm not in camp like I should be.

I fainted right as I stepped out from my house, burning hotter than hot.

Turns out I had a super high fever, and camp is cancelled for me.

So here I am, blogging and now signing out to regenerate some new brain cells that got burnt and perished in the heat.

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And I decided to cut the seams of them stitches open at last.

Frankly, I'm not the sort to complain a hell lot on stuff in my life and I never whined since primary, but yes, it's coming back to me again.

Since entering high school, the image that the VAST majority people thought of me was a happy go lucky person who's super optimistic and goes through practically everything in life like a breeze.

And sadly, of myself, yes I am, I still am like that till now.

In Form 1, I was in a clique in school. Maybe clique is not the right word, but yeah, a group of close knitted friends, and I thought I had some friends at last.

Form 2 instead brings me the memories of sitting alone in front of the teacher's table for a year and leaving the group as I had a lot of soul searching to do. I mean, I wasn't being myself in school and I feel bloody falarking fake.

Yes, sue me, eat me, whatever. I'm a total loser back in those days.

Now, in Form 3 brings me friends again, but this time I'm solely being myself.

But being myself now, a whole shit load of people in school are going loco over it.

Get over it.

I like who I am.

I ALWAYS did.

No more talking to the human that looks and thinks exactly like me in the mirror about my problems.

Honestly, I never did that for quite some time already, I really thought I found some great peeps in school.

But also honestly, I don't feel very friendly either to you guys.

You know, now the people who I can actually call them a friend is only a few, oh yes, very few indeed. And it's not even who you might think it is.

And now, presenting the real confessions.

I'M SICK OF HELPING YOU GUYS LIKE SOME SOFT HEARTED BRAINLESS GIRAFFE, I always say no actually, but I still help you guys out, whether it's information on school homework or school activities, or just some plain old minor issues that needs cleaning out.

WHAT YOU GUYS DO TO ME IS, whenever I ask nicely, you guys just shun me off like I'm dust flying into your eyes. I just want to know certain stuff about homework, is it wrong just to share some information with me? Sure, you all may be busy studying and doing your thing and all, but truthfully it's like so falarking selfish of you guys. I'm sick of being nice already.

Yeah, from the more mature people that are reading my blog, this is reality. I totally knew that.

But it's still people I have to meet and see and interact and talk to everyday in school. Why is it that you guys are so obsessed with the thought of being ahead of everybody? I mean that isn't bad, I understand everybody wants self-improvement and to be the best among the rest, but you are even willing to backstab and use your own friends in your own gang to achieve your goals to be NUMBER ONE.

If that's the case, let me honestly ask you guys this simple question(s), really.

What does the word friend mean to you?

Do you think the friends you have now are truly your friends?

Do you think you had been a real friend to your friend(s)?

Well, I might like to advise you, that you should consider and really think about your friends and whether they ARE your friends.

Or not.

*****
Speaking about friends, I really don't want to mention any names, least that this innocent blog of mine purely just with the simple mission to deliver my thoughts and opinions to the world (and as a ranting space and a journal as well) gets a bad name for something I did not mean at all. Quoting my mumsie dear, which she said in Chinese but I'm just gonna roughly translate it here,

"They say women are the most 'poisonous'(cunning, sly) creatures on Earth, that even real poison could not even fight or compare with, but actually the most poisonous thing on this Earth is actually the HUMAN MOUTH."

Yes, I definitely agree.

The mouth can say anything it wants. At least the owner of that mouth chooses what to say anyway.

It could be good, but the thing is, it's really used for the most evil of issues.

Rumours.

Stories.

Untruths.

Lies.

Those who do all this kind of inhumane stuff, shame on you.

I had been a victim of this for I-don't-know-how-many-times already.

But the worst yet had to be when somebody told my Maths teacher that I said her teaching is sucky and I do not dare to ask her questions on Maths because I'm too scared to do so.

She gave me a place in hell to live in, she was so convinced I did it.

Well, to that person, I'll never know who you are I guess, but you know what, it won't do you any good passing rumours about me, because it doesn't bring any benefits to you.

Yeah sure, you might be smirking there whenever I get a sarcastic remark or rude comments on my by the teacher, but in the end it still brings you no good.

By doing this will you ever be a successful person?

By doing this, will it secure you straight As' in your examinations and a high post when you step into the working world, as reality cruelly shows all the time?

No.

It's still your own effort to work hard and succeed, and even if you do get me in trouble which you already did, if you don't work for it, still your loss, my dear.

*****
It's sad how I'm losing the people I quite know them as friends.

Guys, you know who you are, since you're an avid reader(s) of my blog, but maybe no more, but if there's any problems can you just discuss it with me? I'm still the same, really, despite me hanging out with the people we said we never really liked, by terms of their attitude problems.

I'm just trying to stay on the neutral side, really.

*****
And now I just realized 99.99% of my real friends are people outside of SIGS.

It's either we can really click with the same interests and I don't have to really give a fake smile each time I see them, or I really respect them like hell on their way of self-expression and their outlook on how to live life.

And I'm glad I know people like these.

Because it's plainly because of them, I'm still living life like a completely sane person who's actually this close to insanity.

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In case this is not clear, this blogger was using Photoshop to erase her friend's worksheet's answers to get a whole new sheet of exercise which she had misplaced and now have to make do with this copy.

I know, I'm a totally very really seriously sad sad person.

Ahahahahahahah =)

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Yep, I went and I'm back. Heh.

Had a freaking awesome time, though I was fashionably late, but I made it in, with much thanks to Alvin Sanjay for registering for me, as the guy at the counter was pretty pissed off or something. Hahah, the stress from too many guests I guess XD

So anyway, the theme's The Golden Era in the USA from the 60s to the 80s and I think I'll let the pictures do most of the job here yep ;)

So this is the one and only Melissa singing the theme song You've Got A Friend, and yeah, I said this countless times but her singing's still awesome, since the first time I heard her sing during last year's FOA. Heh XD

And there were a few performances by the band, the Royal Vanguards as mentioned by Le Nutcase fou, so some pictures I snapped, which are taken at a very bad angle, lol.



So yeah, they were great too, of course, heheh, especially One Way performed by the one and only cracky advisor, as he calls himself, Chris XD I must say =D

Then there was a fashion show, a sketch titled A Painful Lesson, which was pretty hilarious, hahah, and a dance, which was really cool XD



I bet they spent ages practising this dance, heheh.

Mel and Colin, I think that's his name, the stars of the dance floor =D

And yeah, soon after, or maybe before that, there was the Installation, with a certain sergeant-at-arms trying to make me reannounce his post =.= Hahah.

Oh yeah, they made us dance too! I had fun with that, even though I'm completely clueless about the moves, but a Form 6 Interactor from SDJ who sat with us kept on saying that it's perfectly easy and fine, yeah, I felt better. She's really nice =) Though now I feel bad, cos I don't even know her name! Can anybody tell me? She's one of the person who got the lucky draw =) And gosh, I think Alvin Sanjay recorded the whole thing, but I wanna see! XDD Pretty curious to see the expression on my face while I was there dancing with two left feet X)

Next, we had games, definately, lol. At first Najwa and I were totally groupless, as we didn't get the colour draw during the registration, but yeah, after trying to end up in the White team aka The Crazy People, with one of the so-called cute guy that Najwa likes in there, including Menaka, Gan, and Kasturi, Ronald the game master sorted us into the Green team aka The Green Monkeys! XD Our one and only cracky adviser as he calls himself is Chris, credits for the unique and monkey-based name to him, hahah. It was really totally random, he thought it up on the spot as I can see, they only gave a few minutes to think something up.

So yeah, Green Monkeys we are, went on through a whole bunch of people and crazy obstacles in a game called the Interact Race, as named by Ronald, and yeah, had a whole bunch of fun =D

First we had to do this cheering game, whichever team who can think of a cheer for their team in the least amount of time gets 5 points, and so on. Ended up being a monkey-ish human, for real XD

I still have two of the clues from the game :

Each team must send a team or an individual contestant for this game to show their talent. Points will be given as the cheering game. (TALENT SHOW)

We ended up doing a group thing and sang Kenangan Terindah. I think we got points for this one cos we're the ONLY team who sang a Malay song =.= Hahah.

Next, this :

Find a guy who is form 3, Indian, tallest, blue attire.

Found the guy, thought it was Gurjivan, but obviously it wasn't, so in any case we got the right guy, and had to do this matching thing with the theme of Hollywood stars and their respecting leads. We got through that pretty well, and Gurj said he was proud of us, therefore he's gonna add 1 more extra point for us =) But I have no idea whether he really did that or not, so yeah X)

Right, this nice girl volunteered to blow the balloon with the clue in it, and instead of blowing it till it bursts like the rules stated, Chris just happened to take the balloon and stepped on it, and that's the story XD

Then, we had to do this quiz consisting of really dumb riddles, and we didn't get to finish it, sadly. But seriously, the answers were just as ridiculous as the questions XDD

But in any case, the Green Monkeys were in the lead the whole way with 31 points and we were the special people to get the special prize =DD

Split everything up and I took the Twisties XD Chris suggested that we share the sparkling grape wine or thingamajig on the spot, cos everyone definitely deserved it for playing hard and well =) He even went to search for cups for us, that was plain nice and sweet, heh.

In any case, it tasted really sour!

Right, I took the broken cork from the wine bottle that Chris happily broke while trying to open it, lol. Alvin Sanjay apparently tried using a freaking fork to open it, but of course, didn't work out either XDD In the end, Chris went and ask for assistance to open that bloody bottle already! XD

And yeah, Green Monkeys United, babeh! XD

In any case, more pics:

Mel and me =)

Naomi, Kasturi, Gurpreet, and The Ddangae couple =)

Poseurs, poseurs X) They look good but I don't! Heheh XD

The much beloved - Mr and Mrs Ddangae X)

Group Photo 1, spot me if you can ;)

Group Photo 2, and again, spot me with the weird face expression, hahah.

And what I wore in the end :

Man, I was really disappointed I couldn't wear Option 3, that outrageously gorgeous dress, but due to some complications on my back, yes, my back, I didn't get to wear it. Crud. But yeah, I had support from Najwa, and she found that head scarf for me to match the outfit, so yeah, I can't do anything about it now, but hope I looked good yeah =D

What am I saying.

Hell yeah, I DO LOOK GOOD! XDDDDD

The end products from the day - A bag of Twisties, a really nice booklet with that aw-so-cute-ribbon =) and drumsticks. Not ordinary ones, but those with rubber tips. It's a real good gift from a good friend whose name I'm not gonna mention, but yeah, hope you like the chocs, though I doubt you'll ever come across this =] And yep, I'll put the effort needed to brush up the drumming skills yeap =]]

My entry bracelet made into ring. It kept falling off, so thanks Guppy for tying it up for me. Lol.




For more updates, go to Najwa's and Naomi's blog for anything that I may have missed out, and extra info from their point of view =}

Can't wait for Mel's update =D

And concluding the day's event,

I FOUND A FRIEND IN YOU, YOU, YOU, AND YOU :)

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As the title goes.

I'm leaving my other entries for another time, as I have this big question mark stuck in the depths of my teeny tiny brain.

In any case, I'm attending SDJ's IU Day on the 14th of June in the Crystal Crown Hotel, with the theme The Golden Era in the USA. The attire stated is Smart/Casual concerning the 60s to the 80s, and trust me, I'm totally clueless about it. Till Autopsy Jude enlightened me on that part XD

Anyway, I've been getting mixed responses about the whole attire issue, since it's considered weird-looking to be following the theme as the majority (not including Najwa and Naomi) thinks it's really outdated and lame, and instead got to the smart idea of wearing just a plain tee and jeans.

Question, what's the use of a theme anyway if not to follow it? Well, I'm not that knowledgeable in matters of functions such as these, so correct me if I'm wrong.

But anyways, I'm torn between what to wear, and now I'm asking YOUR honest, sincere opinion which is the most suitable for this function.

So, here goes nothing X)

Option 1 :

A white top with slightly puffed sleeves and a long satiny-like black polka-dotted skirt, which belongs to my mum, haha. And plus point, those polka dots actually go rainbow coloured with the right lighting =D This ensemble is more to casual I guess.

Option 2 :

The same white top from Option 1, and another pastel coloured skirt with a bow at the side belonging to my mum. Looks more smart to me.

Option 3 :

I just got this gorgeous dress from my aunt today. It's really RRRREEEEAAAALLLLLLY vintage, dates all the way back to the 80s. Has major puffed sleeves, broad neckline, and that's a rose design you're seeing XD My aunt used to wear this during her dates X) Both smart and casual in one piece.

But now the question is, do all of these options look like they popped out from the Golden Era in the USA? Opinions are much and highly appreciated in my tagbox please. Or sms, MSN, the likes =)

Next, the bag issue. You gotta be thinking I'm some brainless girl who can't even choose what to wear for a function. Don't blame me, it's the first time I'm attending another school's IU, so pardon the outdatedness XD

Bag 1 :

Another one of my aunt's. Guess what, it's entirely made out of plastic bags, woven into a bag design. Really cute, but pretty small for my liking. Anyway, it's for the outfit and my aunt who said I must put it to good use so, what do you guys think? =]

Bag 2 :

And fine, another one of my aunt's, like seriously, but she gave this one to me a year ago =}

And, I couldn't resist the temptation to snap pictures of me looking so different. Hahah.


And two shall do till the function is over XD

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It’s not an English name I came up with for myself. My mother is indeed a genius in coming up with such a splendid name for me. Although my name has been unfortunately mutilated (nicknames are excluded) over the past years, full credits to my mum for my current identity.

I’m certainly looking forward to changing the word ‘patient’ to ‘survivor’! If you’re interested to read about my journey in battling lymphoma, you can click here to proceed to my cancer blog.

Ironic, I know; this blog is mainly pink instead. I like all colours actually, but I find myself having an affinity to the colour green. In fact, I can safely say that green is my soul colour.

Languages, music, fashion, photography, cultures, dance, literature, writing; just about anything, really. The arts truly intrigue me, especially thought-provoking pieces. Of course, the arts play a major role in inspiring me in my everyday life.

I don’t have a favourite genre – I read any book that interests me!

I am a trained right-hander from young, since apparently being left-handed is considered ‘wrong’. Basically, I’m ambidextrous! No wonder I find it easier to air guitar using my left hand than my right; I simply relate to the arts than subjects that deal with logical thinking better, too.

A stubborn Bull I am, too. I abhor being rushed. I prefer doing matters at my own reasonable pace. I don’t particularly like changes in my routine, but I can adapt quite easily. I’m a very practical person as well. I enjoy the beautiful things in life, but that doesn’t make me shun ugliness at all. Besides, it all depends on how one perceives beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

Still am, but I’m slowly learning to accept imperfection into my life. Also, I’m doing my best to erase the many expectations I have so I could one day master the art of letting go and freeing myself to simple happiness and joy.

Compared to before, I’m less dramatic nowadays. Language-wise, I attempt to blog flawlessly in English and speak proper English online with my peers. Call me a Grammar Nazi all you want, but that’s how I roll. I only converse in perfect English in formal situations and during my dramatic outbursts. Otherwise, I’m absolutely capable of communicating like the average Malaysian!

It’s a different issue altogether when you’re forced to learn for the sake of getting good grades, though. Other than that, I’m open to new information and knowledge anytime! I especially would like to learn more languages and pick up new musical instruments.

…are just some of the things I would love to do in the near future, hopefully!

the basic rules apply. If you respect me, I’ll respect you. If you happen to be someone who has low EQ skills, I’ll try to be tolerant but my patience is definitely limited. I’m observant when it comes to human behaviour. I’m a person of many opinions, but I don’t voice them out unless I trust you enough; I’m very honest and candid when it comes to the people I can trust. Even though I trust very easily, not everybody can prove that they’re all that nice. Hurt me, and I’ll only defend myself if necessary. Hurt my family or my friends – you won’t find me holding back.

Is there anything else you would like to know about me?
Throw me your questions and/or doubts here! I honestly have nothing to hide, so you’ll expect the truth and nothing but the truth.

It’s only how I phrase my answers that you’ll have to be aware of.
Or…you can click hereto go back to reading!

And yes, 10 things I want to do sometime soon (I hope) :

1. Update my Friendster profile, MySpace profile, Deviantart profile, Facebook profile, Imeem profile, in any case almost everything I signed up for. I think maybe Tagged and Hi5 too, but I never logged in to these two since I really don't know when.

2. Start studying. It's PMR for gooseness sake. Not as important as SPM of course, but still, it determines the stream I'm entering in Form 4, and I'm aiming for Science stream of course, like duh, everybody does, except does who are going for a career that's related to Arts.

3. Update my MP3 player with new songs.

4. DIY my royal gold coloured notebook into a feisty leopard covered skin. Time to be fierce and stay strong in the jiggy jungle. And I just need a sort of motivator as my organizer, and this would do great, if I can ever find time. Sigh.

5. Update my blog with the pictures I took with stuff I bought from MPO. Ah yes, and practise my photography skills, which includes Photoshop. And I want to do something with the stuff I bought from Wanda. Like soon. Maybe during the August holidays? I'll go caliente mad by then.

6. Try out Vlogging. No harm right?

7. Make a blogskin of my own. But hey, I really like my current blogskin, it really represents part of the real me, and it's really simple, neat yet classy too. I'll just have to figure out a nicer one.

8. Finish up all the books that I bought, I think there are over 20 of them I had bought over the year but still have not started reading. Secondary school is really killing my time to read like last time. And that reminds me, I really want to buy and read, of course, the latest book in the Clique series and a new one called The Poseurs.

9. Live, laugh and love. So typical of me, harhar.

And last but not least.

10. Start a new life as me, myself and I, fully with not a single bit of fakeness. I need some heart-to-heart talk with myself and get myself cleared up.

And hoyeah babeh, this girl is gonna make an outstanding comeback in life! XD

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Agonized because I'm making the people who really care about me worried about me. A LOT.

Petrified because I AM petrified. The very same people that are around me are, too.

I am making these people worry over me.

They take my problems as their problems.

They let me rant and go on and on about my very redundant life. And listen too.

They cried with me when I was going through the hardest times of my journey through this evil yet as real as can be - reality.

I won't talk about my parents. They care, only they don't really make it really obvious. Which makes me misunderstand about them the whole time but, yeah, I'm learning.

Today, the wonderful spotlight goes to my piano teacher.

At first, I thought today was gonna be a class that's the same like the previous classes. Bang bang bang the keys, talk talk talk, correct mistakes and give comments, the like.

But, I finally broke down in front of her today.

Yes, I'm actually freak afraid I can't pass my practical for piano this year.

Unknown fact about this blogger - I really need to get the best grades possible for my piano exams so that I can be a certified piano teacher to get some extra duckets for my family, and nobody's pressuring me to get a distinction for a must, instead I'm pushing myself to go for the best. (I guess this is what SIGS does partly to you, harhar.) It's not like we're loaded you know, there's tons of finances to think about, and I wanna help lighten this burden for my parents, by earning my own pocket money to fund myself, while they can use that amount of money to settle more important issues.

I already failed last year, and I never realized it, but I'm actually traumatized by my past experience of sitting for my Grade 5 practical and failed for playing something I did not.

I understand that luck plays a part in the grading too, but I just couldn't believe I was just THAT unlucky.

I had really depended on pure luck for the past 15 years of my life, I actually found myself pretty lucky indeed.

But till last year, not anymore.

She really counselled me about the whole issue, and she cried too.

I'm sorry I made her cried.

But it wasn't as bad as me. And hoyeah, I seriously do not cry a lot. I never believed in the concept of crying. I always thought it makes me look weak, and the always paranoid me am always afraid that everybody in this world would find it easy to manipulate me and look down on my abilities.

Till this year that is, I now know crying is a way to release some bottled-up emotions.

A mucho gracias to her for being there for me, and for believing in me. I'll seriously find time, even if I have to practise in the middle of the night to make you proud of me. And to let you know you're not wrong in having faith in me.

*****And yes, I realized I'm not in camp like I should be.

I fainted right as I stepped out from my house, burning hotter than hot.

Turns out I had a super high fever, and camp is cancelled for me.

So here I am, blogging and now signing out to regenerate some new brain cells that got burnt and perished in the heat.

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And I decided to cut the seams of them stitches open at last.

Frankly, I'm not the sort to complain a hell lot on stuff in my life and I never whined since primary, but yes, it's coming back to me again.

Since entering high school, the image that the VAST majority people thought of me was a happy go lucky person who's super optimistic and goes through practically everything in life like a breeze.

And sadly, of myself, yes I am, I still am like that till now.

In Form 1, I was in a clique in school. Maybe clique is not the right word, but yeah, a group of close knitted friends, and I thought I had some friends at last.

Form 2 instead brings me the memories of sitting alone in front of the teacher's table for a year and leaving the group as I had a lot of soul searching to do. I mean, I wasn't being myself in school and I feel bloody falarking fake.

Yes, sue me, eat me, whatever. I'm a total loser back in those days.

Now, in Form 3 brings me friends again, but this time I'm solely being myself.

But being myself now, a whole shit load of people in school are going loco over it.

Get over it.

I like who I am.

I ALWAYS did.

No more talking to the human that looks and thinks exactly like me in the mirror about my problems.

Honestly, I never did that for quite some time already, I really thought I found some great peeps in school.

But also honestly, I don't feel very friendly either to you guys.

You know, now the people who I can actually call them a friend is only a few, oh yes, very few indeed. And it's not even who you might think it is.

And now, presenting the real confessions.

I'M SICK OF HELPING YOU GUYS LIKE SOME SOFT HEARTED BRAINLESS GIRAFFE, I always say no actually, but I still help you guys out, whether it's information on school homework or school activities, or just some plain old minor issues that needs cleaning out.

WHAT YOU GUYS DO TO ME IS, whenever I ask nicely, you guys just shun me off like I'm dust flying into your eyes. I just want to know certain stuff about homework, is it wrong just to share some information with me? Sure, you all may be busy studying and doing your thing and all, but truthfully it's like so falarking selfish of you guys. I'm sick of being nice already.

Yeah, from the more mature people that are reading my blog, this is reality. I totally knew that.

But it's still people I have to meet and see and interact and talk to everyday in school. Why is it that you guys are so obsessed with the thought of being ahead of everybody? I mean that isn't bad, I understand everybody wants self-improvement and to be the best among the rest, but you are even willing to backstab and use your own friends in your own gang to achieve your goals to be NUMBER ONE.

If that's the case, let me honestly ask you guys this simple question(s), really.

What does the word friend mean to you?

Do you think the friends you have now are truly your friends?

Do you think you had been a real friend to your friend(s)?

Well, I might like to advise you, that you should consider and really think about your friends and whether they ARE your friends.

Or not.

*****
Speaking about friends, I really don't want to mention any names, least that this innocent blog of mine purely just with the simple mission to deliver my thoughts and opinions to the world (and as a ranting space and a journal as well) gets a bad name for something I did not mean at all. Quoting my mumsie dear, which she said in Chinese but I'm just gonna roughly translate it here,

"They say women are the most 'poisonous'(cunning, sly) creatures on Earth, that even real poison could not even fight or compare with, but actually the most poisonous thing on this Earth is actually the HUMAN MOUTH."

Yes, I definitely agree.

The mouth can say anything it wants. At least the owner of that mouth chooses what to say anyway.

It could be good, but the thing is, it's really used for the most evil of issues.

Rumours.

Stories.

Untruths.

Lies.

Those who do all this kind of inhumane stuff, shame on you.

I had been a victim of this for I-don't-know-how-many-times already.

But the worst yet had to be when somebody told my Maths teacher that I said her teaching is sucky and I do not dare to ask her questions on Maths because I'm too scared to do so.

She gave me a place in hell to live in, she was so convinced I did it.

Well, to that person, I'll never know who you are I guess, but you know what, it won't do you any good passing rumours about me, because it doesn't bring any benefits to you.

Yeah sure, you might be smirking there whenever I get a sarcastic remark or rude comments on my by the teacher, but in the end it still brings you no good.

By doing this will you ever be a successful person?

By doing this, will it secure you straight As' in your examinations and a high post when you step into the working world, as reality cruelly shows all the time?

No.

It's still your own effort to work hard and succeed, and even if you do get me in trouble which you already did, if you don't work for it, still your loss, my dear.

*****
It's sad how I'm losing the people I quite know them as friends.

Guys, you know who you are, since you're an avid reader(s) of my blog, but maybe no more, but if there's any problems can you just discuss it with me? I'm still the same, really, despite me hanging out with the people we said we never really liked, by terms of their attitude problems.

I'm just trying to stay on the neutral side, really.

*****
And now I just realized 99.99% of my real friends are people outside of SIGS.

It's either we can really click with the same interests and I don't have to really give a fake smile each time I see them, or I really respect them like hell on their way of self-expression and their outlook on how to live life.

And I'm glad I know people like these.

Because it's plainly because of them, I'm still living life like a completely sane person who's actually this close to insanity.

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In case this is not clear, this blogger was using Photoshop to erase her friend's worksheet's answers to get a whole new sheet of exercise which she had misplaced and now have to make do with this copy.

I know, I'm a totally very really seriously sad sad person.

Ahahahahahahah =)

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Yep, I went and I'm back. Heh.

Had a freaking awesome time, though I was fashionably late, but I made it in, with much thanks to Alvin Sanjay for registering for me, as the guy at the counter was pretty pissed off or something. Hahah, the stress from too many guests I guess XD

So anyway, the theme's The Golden Era in the USA from the 60s to the 80s and I think I'll let the pictures do most of the job here yep ;)

So this is the one and only Melissa singing the theme song You've Got A Friend, and yeah, I said this countless times but her singing's still awesome, since the first time I heard her sing during last year's FOA. Heh XD

And there were a few performances by the band, the Royal Vanguards as mentioned by Le Nutcase fou, so some pictures I snapped, which are taken at a very bad angle, lol.



So yeah, they were great too, of course, heheh, especially One Way performed by the one and only cracky advisor, as he calls himself, Chris XD I must say =D

Then there was a fashion show, a sketch titled A Painful Lesson, which was pretty hilarious, hahah, and a dance, which was really cool XD



I bet they spent ages practising this dance, heheh.

Mel and Colin, I think that's his name, the stars of the dance floor =D

And yeah, soon after, or maybe before that, there was the Installation, with a certain sergeant-at-arms trying to make me reannounce his post =.= Hahah.

Oh yeah, they made us dance too! I had fun with that, even though I'm completely clueless about the moves, but a Form 6 Interactor from SDJ who sat with us kept on saying that it's perfectly easy and fine, yeah, I felt better. She's really nice =) Though now I feel bad, cos I don't even know her name! Can anybody tell me? She's one of the person who got the lucky draw =) And gosh, I think Alvin Sanjay recorded the whole thing, but I wanna see! XDD Pretty curious to see the expression on my face while I was there dancing with two left feet X)

Next, we had games, definately, lol. At first Najwa and I were totally groupless, as we didn't get the colour draw during the registration, but yeah, after trying to end up in the White team aka The Crazy People, with one of the so-called cute guy that Najwa likes in there, including Menaka, Gan, and Kasturi, Ronald the game master sorted us into the Green team aka The Green Monkeys! XD Our one and only cracky adviser as he calls himself is Chris, credits for the unique and monkey-based name to him, hahah. It was really totally random, he thought it up on the spot as I can see, they only gave a few minutes to think something up.

So yeah, Green Monkeys we are, went on through a whole bunch of people and crazy obstacles in a game called the Interact Race, as named by Ronald, and yeah, had a whole bunch of fun =D

First we had to do this cheering game, whichever team who can think of a cheer for their team in the least amount of time gets 5 points, and so on. Ended up being a monkey-ish human, for real XD

I still have two of the clues from the game :

Each team must send a team or an individual contestant for this game to show their talent. Points will be given as the cheering game. (TALENT SHOW)

We ended up doing a group thing and sang Kenangan Terindah. I think we got points for this one cos we're the ONLY team who sang a Malay song =.= Hahah.

Next, this :

Find a guy who is form 3, Indian, tallest, blue attire.

Found the guy, thought it was Gurjivan, but obviously it wasn't, so in any case we got the right guy, and had to do this matching thing with the theme of Hollywood stars and their respecting leads. We got through that pretty well, and Gurj said he was proud of us, therefore he's gonna add 1 more extra point for us =) But I have no idea whether he really did that or not, so yeah X)

Right, this nice girl volunteered to blow the balloon with the clue in it, and instead of blowing it till it bursts like the rules stated, Chris just happened to take the balloon and stepped on it, and that's the story XD

Then, we had to do this quiz consisting of really dumb riddles, and we didn't get to finish it, sadly. But seriously, the answers were just as ridiculous as the questions XDD

But in any case, the Green Monkeys were in the lead the whole way with 31 points and we were the special people to get the special prize =DD

Split everything up and I took the Twisties XD Chris suggested that we share the sparkling grape wine or thingamajig on the spot, cos everyone definitely deserved it for playing hard and well =) He even went to search for cups for us, that was plain nice and sweet, heh.

In any case, it tasted really sour!

Right, I took the broken cork from the wine bottle that Chris happily broke while trying to open it, lol. Alvin Sanjay apparently tried using a freaking fork to open it, but of course, didn't work out either XDD In the end, Chris went and ask for assistance to open that bloody bottle already! XD

And yeah, Green Monkeys United, babeh! XD

In any case, more pics:

Mel and me =)

Naomi, Kasturi, Gurpreet, and The Ddangae couple =)

Poseurs, poseurs X) They look good but I don't! Heheh XD

The much beloved - Mr and Mrs Ddangae X)

Group Photo 1, spot me if you can ;)

Group Photo 2, and again, spot me with the weird face expression, hahah.

And what I wore in the end :

Man, I was really disappointed I couldn't wear Option 3, that outrageously gorgeous dress, but due to some complications on my back, yes, my back, I didn't get to wear it. Crud. But yeah, I had support from Najwa, and she found that head scarf for me to match the outfit, so yeah, I can't do anything about it now, but hope I looked good yeah =D

What am I saying.

Hell yeah, I DO LOOK GOOD! XDDDDD

The end products from the day - A bag of Twisties, a really nice booklet with that aw-so-cute-ribbon =) and drumsticks. Not ordinary ones, but those with rubber tips. It's a real good gift from a good friend whose name I'm not gonna mention, but yeah, hope you like the chocs, though I doubt you'll ever come across this =] And yep, I'll put the effort needed to brush up the drumming skills yeap =]]

My entry bracelet made into ring. It kept falling off, so thanks Guppy for tying it up for me. Lol.




For more updates, go to Najwa's and Naomi's blog for anything that I may have missed out, and extra info from their point of view =}

Can't wait for Mel's update =D

And concluding the day's event,

I FOUND A FRIEND IN YOU, YOU, YOU, AND YOU :)

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As the title goes.

I'm leaving my other entries for another time, as I have this big question mark stuck in the depths of my teeny tiny brain.

In any case, I'm attending SDJ's IU Day on the 14th of June in the Crystal Crown Hotel, with the theme The Golden Era in the USA. The attire stated is Smart/Casual concerning the 60s to the 80s, and trust me, I'm totally clueless about it. Till Autopsy Jude enlightened me on that part XD

Anyway, I've been getting mixed responses about the whole attire issue, since it's considered weird-looking to be following the theme as the majority (not including Najwa and Naomi) thinks it's really outdated and lame, and instead got to the smart idea of wearing just a plain tee and jeans.

Question, what's the use of a theme anyway if not to follow it? Well, I'm not that knowledgeable in matters of functions such as these, so correct me if I'm wrong.

But anyways, I'm torn between what to wear, and now I'm asking YOUR honest, sincere opinion which is the most suitable for this function.

So, here goes nothing X)

Option 1 :

A white top with slightly puffed sleeves and a long satiny-like black polka-dotted skirt, which belongs to my mum, haha. And plus point, those polka dots actually go rainbow coloured with the right lighting =D This ensemble is more to casual I guess.

Option 2 :

The same white top from Option 1, and another pastel coloured skirt with a bow at the side belonging to my mum. Looks more smart to me.

Option 3 :

I just got this gorgeous dress from my aunt today. It's really RRRREEEEAAAALLLLLLY vintage, dates all the way back to the 80s. Has major puffed sleeves, broad neckline, and that's a rose design you're seeing XD My aunt used to wear this during her dates X) Both smart and casual in one piece.

But now the question is, do all of these options look like they popped out from the Golden Era in the USA? Opinions are much and highly appreciated in my tagbox please. Or sms, MSN, the likes =)

Next, the bag issue. You gotta be thinking I'm some brainless girl who can't even choose what to wear for a function. Don't blame me, it's the first time I'm attending another school's IU, so pardon the outdatedness XD

Bag 1 :

Another one of my aunt's. Guess what, it's entirely made out of plastic bags, woven into a bag design. Really cute, but pretty small for my liking. Anyway, it's for the outfit and my aunt who said I must put it to good use so, what do you guys think? =]

Bag 2 :

And fine, another one of my aunt's, like seriously, but she gave this one to me a year ago =}

And, I couldn't resist the temptation to snap pictures of me looking so different. Hahah.


And two shall do till the function is over XD

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