Emotions aside, I am watching and now am also a big fan of this Hong Kong drama.

You can read about the synopsis here and here.

Personally, I find the Law of Closure from Gestalt psychology, interpersonal space and the empathy effect quite interesting and somehow relatable.

For the first time, I actually am willing to watch a drama continuously for 12 episodes straight, which took approximately 11 hours of my time in one day. Talk about rotting at home and letting time pass more quickly effectively.

I guess it could be a wee bit better compared to me mourning in front of the laptop and wallowing in self-pity seeing photos of my friends having fun out there, while I'm stuck at home. Please don't be mistaken, I am happy to see my friends having a great time with their loved ones. But honestly, I do feel a little left out, a little left behind, and a little jealous of said friends. I can't help it.

I'll eventually get over it. Or maybe never. Oh well.

I'm left with five more episodes, and then I'll be done with this drama. Maybe I'll try to finish watching a whole stack of DVDs of movies I'd been missing out for the past six months or so.

Cheers.

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It's already the second night of the new year.

I wasted most of yesterday trying to change my blog link and editing the codes for my apparent new blogskin, which both came to no avail. My instincts are telling me that I shouldn't change my link for the time being, and I should put more effort into creating another blogskin based on the codes that I already have. Both takes time, so I'll just have to be very patient.

*I realised that I am now 17 going on 18. I had so many plans for my 18th year living on planet Earth. It saddens me that they are still unfulfilled, due to my condition.

My peers are busy preparing for college life, most of them away from their homes and going up north to KL. Some of them are busy with jobs, earning their own keep and learning to be streetwise. Then there are others, just spending time with their family and friends. Not forgetting the ones who are responding to the government's call to serve their nation for three months. And those that are holidaying just about anywhere other than home.

Then there are those who are just idling in the comfort of their homes, doing whatever they please and, in my terms, rotting at home.

Obviously, I'm in the last category. But unlike my peers, I was sentenced to such a life unwillingly.

Half of my year as a fifth former was gone, just like that. I know there's no point, but I fully blame cancer for not giving me a chance to live my final year of high school properly and end it normally.

I haven't seen most of my friends and classmates for six months now, what more have a proper conversation with any of them. (This makes me very thankful for Gurpreet, who has been calling me occasionally and spending hours on the phone to accompany me, without a single complaint.) To the few who did call me, you have my thanks too. But it's Gurpreet who really put in the effort to call me frequently and update me on what's going on out there.

And before I get accused of being ungrateful to the rest that called me for only crediting Gup, I have my reasons.

You might tell me that you couldn't call very often because you're afraid of disturbing my rest and/or you're busy with your lives.

I won't be throwing accusations at anyone, so let me tell you what Gup does. She normally texts me beforehand, asking me whether it's okay for her to call or not. And for your information, Gup is also a fifth former who is busy with long school hours, tuition classes and SPM. How is it that she can delegate some of her time to talk to me despite her equally busy schedule?

With that, I am to proud to fully credit Gup on my blog for everything she has been doing for me.

Oh yes, I would also like to honour a few select people that told the teachers in school that they often call me and know about my progress in fighting cancer. My dears, word spreads very quickly. I already found out of your very kind deed(s), but I also found out that you all are liars. You never called, not even once. Calling me and reading my cancer blog and Facebook posts are two separate things altogether, for your information. But thank you for letting me see your true colours.

And to some of the rest who called, calling me just to ask how much I'd studied for SPM and/or talking about yourself and ranting at me made me feel very small and useless, because I couldn't offer much help and you remind me of the guilt I harbour for not studying enough. Thanks a lot.

I'm just saying, you know. If any one of you feel offended by my words, it's only because you feel guilty about it. If you're going to defend yourself by waging a cold/fierce war with me, it is only going to show how obvious you're trying to deny what you did.

Don't ever assume I won't find out. Somehow, and without even trying, I will know and gradually will find out.

*I'm aware I sound very angsty and angry. I just need to get this out of my system.

Cheers.

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It’s not an English name I came up with for myself. My mother is indeed a genius in coming up with such a splendid name for me. Although my name has been unfortunately mutilated (nicknames are excluded) over the past years, full credits to my mum for my current identity.

I’m certainly looking forward to changing the word ‘patient’ to ‘survivor’! If you’re interested to read about my journey in battling lymphoma, you can click here to proceed to my cancer blog.

Ironic, I know; this blog is mainly pink instead. I like all colours actually, but I find myself having an affinity to the colour green. In fact, I can safely say that green is my soul colour.

Languages, music, fashion, photography, cultures, dance, literature, writing; just about anything, really. The arts truly intrigue me, especially thought-provoking pieces. Of course, the arts play a major role in inspiring me in my everyday life.

I don’t have a favourite genre – I read any book that interests me!

I am a trained right-hander from young, since apparently being left-handed is considered ‘wrong’. Basically, I’m ambidextrous! No wonder I find it easier to air guitar using my left hand than my right; I simply relate to the arts than subjects that deal with logical thinking better, too.

A stubborn Bull I am, too. I abhor being rushed. I prefer doing matters at my own reasonable pace. I don’t particularly like changes in my routine, but I can adapt quite easily. I’m a very practical person as well. I enjoy the beautiful things in life, but that doesn’t make me shun ugliness at all. Besides, it all depends on how one perceives beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

Still am, but I’m slowly learning to accept imperfection into my life. Also, I’m doing my best to erase the many expectations I have so I could one day master the art of letting go and freeing myself to simple happiness and joy.

Compared to before, I’m less dramatic nowadays. Language-wise, I attempt to blog flawlessly in English and speak proper English online with my peers. Call me a Grammar Nazi all you want, but that’s how I roll. I only converse in perfect English in formal situations and during my dramatic outbursts. Otherwise, I’m absolutely capable of communicating like the average Malaysian!

It’s a different issue altogether when you’re forced to learn for the sake of getting good grades, though. Other than that, I’m open to new information and knowledge anytime! I especially would like to learn more languages and pick up new musical instruments.

…are just some of the things I would love to do in the near future, hopefully!

the basic rules apply. If you respect me, I’ll respect you. If you happen to be someone who has low EQ skills, I’ll try to be tolerant but my patience is definitely limited. I’m observant when it comes to human behaviour. I’m a person of many opinions, but I don’t voice them out unless I trust you enough; I’m very honest and candid when it comes to the people I can trust. Even though I trust very easily, not everybody can prove that they’re all that nice. Hurt me, and I’ll only defend myself if necessary. Hurt my family or my friends – you won’t find me holding back.

Is there anything else you would like to know about me?
Throw me your questions and/or doubts here! I honestly have nothing to hide, so you’ll expect the truth and nothing but the truth.

It’s only how I phrase my answers that you’ll have to be aware of.
Or…you can click hereto go back to reading!

Emotions aside, I am watching and now am also a big fan of this Hong Kong drama.

You can read about the synopsis here and here.

Personally, I find the Law of Closure from Gestalt psychology, interpersonal space and the empathy effect quite interesting and somehow relatable.

For the first time, I actually am willing to watch a drama continuously for 12 episodes straight, which took approximately 11 hours of my time in one day. Talk about rotting at home and letting time pass more quickly effectively.

I guess it could be a wee bit better compared to me mourning in front of the laptop and wallowing in self-pity seeing photos of my friends having fun out there, while I'm stuck at home. Please don't be mistaken, I am happy to see my friends having a great time with their loved ones. But honestly, I do feel a little left out, a little left behind, and a little jealous of said friends. I can't help it.

I'll eventually get over it. Or maybe never. Oh well.

I'm left with five more episodes, and then I'll be done with this drama. Maybe I'll try to finish watching a whole stack of DVDs of movies I'd been missing out for the past six months or so.

Cheers.

0 comment(s):

Post a Comment

It's already the second night of the new year.

I wasted most of yesterday trying to change my blog link and editing the codes for my apparent new blogskin, which both came to no avail. My instincts are telling me that I shouldn't change my link for the time being, and I should put more effort into creating another blogskin based on the codes that I already have. Both takes time, so I'll just have to be very patient.

*I realised that I am now 17 going on 18. I had so many plans for my 18th year living on planet Earth. It saddens me that they are still unfulfilled, due to my condition.

My peers are busy preparing for college life, most of them away from their homes and going up north to KL. Some of them are busy with jobs, earning their own keep and learning to be streetwise. Then there are others, just spending time with their family and friends. Not forgetting the ones who are responding to the government's call to serve their nation for three months. And those that are holidaying just about anywhere other than home.

Then there are those who are just idling in the comfort of their homes, doing whatever they please and, in my terms, rotting at home.

Obviously, I'm in the last category. But unlike my peers, I was sentenced to such a life unwillingly.

Half of my year as a fifth former was gone, just like that. I know there's no point, but I fully blame cancer for not giving me a chance to live my final year of high school properly and end it normally.

I haven't seen most of my friends and classmates for six months now, what more have a proper conversation with any of them. (This makes me very thankful for Gurpreet, who has been calling me occasionally and spending hours on the phone to accompany me, without a single complaint.) To the few who did call me, you have my thanks too. But it's Gurpreet who really put in the effort to call me frequently and update me on what's going on out there.

And before I get accused of being ungrateful to the rest that called me for only crediting Gup, I have my reasons.

You might tell me that you couldn't call very often because you're afraid of disturbing my rest and/or you're busy with your lives.

I won't be throwing accusations at anyone, so let me tell you what Gup does. She normally texts me beforehand, asking me whether it's okay for her to call or not. And for your information, Gup is also a fifth former who is busy with long school hours, tuition classes and SPM. How is it that she can delegate some of her time to talk to me despite her equally busy schedule?

With that, I am to proud to fully credit Gup on my blog for everything she has been doing for me.

Oh yes, I would also like to honour a few select people that told the teachers in school that they often call me and know about my progress in fighting cancer. My dears, word spreads very quickly. I already found out of your very kind deed(s), but I also found out that you all are liars. You never called, not even once. Calling me and reading my cancer blog and Facebook posts are two separate things altogether, for your information. But thank you for letting me see your true colours.

And to some of the rest who called, calling me just to ask how much I'd studied for SPM and/or talking about yourself and ranting at me made me feel very small and useless, because I couldn't offer much help and you remind me of the guilt I harbour for not studying enough. Thanks a lot.

I'm just saying, you know. If any one of you feel offended by my words, it's only because you feel guilty about it. If you're going to defend yourself by waging a cold/fierce war with me, it is only going to show how obvious you're trying to deny what you did.

Don't ever assume I won't find out. Somehow, and without even trying, I will know and gradually will find out.

*I'm aware I sound very angsty and angry. I just need to get this out of my system.

Cheers.

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Post a Comment