I'm still loaded with homework and can't concentrate on coding my new blogskin now as I know that schoolwork awaits me.

Tuition work too.

So, my codes are all messed up and I'm a very unhappy and angry monster now.


Will update once I managed to get it all done and over with, and that also means once my new blogskin is done.

Hopefully.

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As usual, I'm going to Melaka again like every other year during CNY to celebrate the festivities with my family (:

This time round, I'm going there with my some relatives and cousins, so this should be a different experience.

Yeah, different indeed. 'Cos I intend to bring my books there to try to work on my homework and study for the upcoming test. I'm really behind in my studies due to me falling asleep in class and tuition.

A LOT.

I'll be leaving tomorrow and will be back on Thursday!

Till the next post, xoxo to all!

PS : I'm working on my new blogskin (:

PS2 : Veena is now officially known as HOTWIND people! Don't kill me Vee, Cassandran made me do this! =P

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Happy Chi-yuh-nese New Year to all those that celebrates it!
It's the Year of the Ox and my only resolution for the new year..

Stay alive,
and keep sane.
Cheers to all and have a merry holiday while you still can!

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"Caged."
Trapped within my own feelings?
Yes I definitely am.

This blog can only do this much as a source to channel all the pent-up emotions from the daily life of yours truly.

But my blog is also public, therefore I still have to be careful of what I write down here.

As of this year, do I only know that my presence make such a huge impact on some people.

It's quite an ah-mazing discovery for an insignificant homosapien like moi.

But ironically, I rather stay as that insignificant human with a drama-less life then have all of this hitting me at one go.

So, to these two humans that told me that my appearance in their lives had made such an impact on them, I have something to say.

Something that I can't bear to say directly to the both of you, for I really do not want you both to feel hurt, as if I really did made such a huge impact in your lives as you both apparently say, I might be charged the following day as a suspect involved in a suicide case.

I have a whole life in front of me, and I don't want anybody dead over mere little me, so here it is.

To You.
The moment we met we never agreed on anything.
And finally when we started getting closer and all, you changed into someone nicer.
Too nice if I might say.
I know, I sound too much,
as in why am I even bothered to rant about someone being nicer to me,
'cos ain't that supposed to be a good thing?
But the problem is, you changed because of me, and frankly,
I'm not used to the new you.
Maybe that is why I told you to give me a break,
to sort out my thoughts and emotions.
I was friends with you for the fact that we had so much to talk about and exchange our opinions on,
and the next moment you were all sweet words,
and going on and on about how perfect I am and such.
I'm sorry, maybe you didn't do anything wrong and any normal teen girl would had been squealing in pure delight with your words,
but this is me.
I'm very practical and I just got really disgusted with what you often said to me.
All that stuff which you added the word forever in,
I was actually thinking back on how long this would last.
I don't think this can work out anymore,
so I advise you to move on,
and I'm sorry.
It's not because of him I'm doing all this,
but I just realized I can't handle this kind of issues yet,
even if I'm as mature in thought as you said I am.

To You.
My biggest mistake to you is to get carried away by your honest feelings,
and I was fazed by everything you said.
Every time I would be asking myself the same thing,
"Is this what I really feel and think about you?
'Cos I think I might be lying to you without realizing it."
Sorry wouldn't be enough to diminish the pain you might go through if you'll ever know it's you I'm talking about.
I'm actually not very impressed at all that you're incorporating me into many aspects of your life,
especially with the fact you said you were inspired by me and the results from that aren't really as great as expected.
I rather you be yourself,
for that's the reason why I liked you as a really good friend in the first place.
I never felt that cared by any individual before,
nor did I ever felt so loved either.
I'm touched by all the things you said to me,
but..
Am I really worth all your time and emotions?
Am I worth being the subject of your poems and songs that you composed?
Am I worth the wait?
'Cos honestly, I don't think I deserve you.
I'm too practical, emotionless and selfish to deserve this attention from you.
Telling this to your face would kill you inside,
'cos I truly know you're really emotional and sentimental.
And I just couldn't bear to say it to your face.

To the both of you,
I rather if we stayed great close friends.
It's because of the both of you,
that I'm not so sure of my original principles in life anymore.
If I were to speak a truth about this,
is that both of you had made great impacts in my life too.
Sorry is really not enough,
I know.
But I can't live in this lie anymore.
And I can't go on knowing that I'm just lying to the both of you.
I got carried away,
to put it rudely to myself,
I think I might actually had played with both your feelings.
I sound like a bitch saying this.
But,
I would say this again and once more,
openly and publicly on this blog,
that I do not have a crush nor love any guy,
for the time being,
and that's because of another,
he stole from me all prospects of loving another,
and turned my heart into stone.
Thanks to this individual,
now two would have to suffer the consequences.
I don't expect the both of you to forgive me,
and I know it's too much to forget easily.
Please.
All I'm asking for now is some time to get my life organized,
to sort my thoughts out.
And to rethink whether we still can work this out,
whether as friends or to be involved in that emotion with that four lettered word,
called LOVE.

I know this word can't give the same impact as what my doings had did to you both,
but still,
sincerely from the bottom of my stoned heart..

I'm sorry.

For letting you guys get to know and love the pathetic me.

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First of all, the MOST AWESOME thanks to the fellow RYLA-rians - namely..
Picasso aka Mr Cankien,
Fiona aka Little Miss Meanie,
and Farhan sayang!
I managed to finish my Chemistry homework thanks to the links you guys provided me and Fiona with her naming tons of random chemicals for me!
:D
No thanks to Irwin Goh though for calling me pig =.=

Next, MUCHO thanks to everybody that wished me luck and helped me passed my cooking test on Monday with flying colours I should say!
(:
Especially to Min Wen for snapping the pics and reassuring me I won't fail,
Pn Tea for helping me with stuff here and there,
Hazel, Xin Yun and Kat for doing my part of the cleaning up at the cooking room 'cos I had to go back earlier,
and my mumsie for helping me with the preparations!
Coming soon,
Camper's Badge.
Please pray for my success readers!
And for my friends that are doing the test too!

SINCEREST thanks to everybody that told me to chill,
referring to my previous post.
I'll definitely try,
will be hard though.
Trying to settle down into this new lifestyle.
Hopefully, that's soon.
And to Christopher,
we had a deal!
Don't ever forget!
x]

Thanks too to Jamie, Catherine and Angela for letting me confide in them about camp issues.
Apparently they noticed I had a hard time with the last camp,
and apparently, they totally understand what I'm going through.
Gracious, they better be official Queen's Guides later in the year,
bless them all!

And to my dearie Dee,
who totally made my effed up day a whole lot better.
And yes people,
read this well.
She's still the Motherfucking Princess y'all.
MY Motherfucking Princess!
I heart her still (=

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School is currently killing me - what with endless homework, prefect duty even though it's much simpler than last year but I have to miss 10 to 15 minutes of classes after recess, Interact with Miss Nav not being our teacher adviser anymore and IU Day still not really planned, sport practices which is just to oblige the teachers to show how dedicated we are even if some of us really have no athletic talent namely yours truly, extra classes like Music and Japanese with me having to take Music as an extra subject in SPM and going for some national level Japanese exam in KL this year end, new subjects in Form 4 that have so much to understand and memorize but so little time, incoming assignments on miscellaneous tasks, staying back till so late just to fulfill the PNP thingamajig, and now the next reason for more white hair - taking up Queen's Guide for real, trying to finish up the buku logs, what with my Kelas Dua nowhere near done yet, having to start on Tali Pekelilingan earlier than the previous batch, us being the last batch under Cik Low who will definitely want us to be her best yet, going broke to prepare for I-don't-know-how-many-tests which involves loads of camping, cooking, photo-developing, and buying more test pads for buku logs. Tell me I'm doomed.

Tuition is being a drag, especially after school. I have Biology, Chemistry, Physics, Add. Math and BM for the time being, but I have homework from all these too. And I'm expected to finish them. Not even Pn Rohaini will let me off now for not doing my essays now!

Piano lessons are still on hold, the original plan of completing Grade 8 before SPM seems so bleak now. My only option of a part-time job as a piano teacher after SPM is going down, since my mum objects to every other part-time job out there that's available.

Have to find a new club for sports. It's now either joining the Chess Club or if I really can, Archery. But for Archery it's only limited to those that can really play and represent the school as the main team, but seriously, sounds like something I still have a chance at doing rather than the Gymnast Club which I had been a not so active member for the past three years. Evonne would completely get what I'm talking about.

Rozi is not helping either. Seriously, she still asks me to do reports for her, find people to do her work for her, and persuade the rest to play Cak or Pacik performances for school events. And with that, she still refuses to let me have a copy of the keys for the Music Room! Honestly, how am I to do certain work if I can't even enter the Music Room which is locked half the time and I still feel bad for having to bug Xin Yun everytime just for the keys!

What's more, I'm trying to survive with Accounts, which I am now currently clueless in. If it's in English, life would be easier for me, since my mum could teach me. But now, she can't understand any of the Malay terms and I lost my only hope for somebody to guide me in Accounts. Yikes? Yeaps indeed.

And then there's debate, IIUM, and other random events that may just pop out of nowhere which makes attendance compulsory. I would love to go, and honestly don't want to sound whiny, but I'm kind of tired from this current lifestyle and I don't even know whether I can spare not going for tuition or skipping school to attend school trips anymore. And if any of the activities clash, it'll be the end of the world for me. Not exaggerating there.

I don't even have time to revise anymore. Oh please, don't let my parents kill me if I fail my first exam. I doubt I can pass anything at this rate.

And you know what?

I'm still trying to stay positive at this point, but I find it so freaking hard.

I'm praying so hard to get used to upper secondary life.

I miss just mucking around after PMR.

I miss RYLA '08, especially fellow RYLA-rians whom I can truly call FRIENDS.

I miss sleeping in during the holidays.

Compared to life now, Form Three was peanuts, and to think that I'd complained so freaking much.

So readers, if there are still any since everyone is back to their own busy lives, if I don't update on a regular basis, it's 'cos I'm still trying to adapt to this culture shock and so-called honeymoon year apparently, bullshit to that human that made that theory up.

This blogger shall not be held responsible for any form of injury or after effects .
In other words,
"Don't Sue Me.
Me Have No Duckets.
Nor A Life."
"Sweet Sixteen."

Pffffffft.

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Quick update.

And I shall hereby list down here the current schedule of my ah-mazingly even more busy life.

Firstly, school lessons officially ends at 2.30PM from Mondays to Thursdays, 12.10 on Fridays. What I have now is as of the following :

Monday : Music classes, 3 - 5.55PM. (starts after 21st February)
Green House Practise, 3 - 5PM.
Tuesday : 2.45 - 4.30PM, Japanese lessons.
Wednesday : Green House Practise, 3 - 5PM.
Thursday : BM with Pn Rohaini, 4 - 6PM.
Friday : Biology with Mr Kung, 2.30 - 4.30PM.
Saturday : Physics with Mr Cham, 2.30 - 4.30PM.
Sunday : Chemistry with Mr Lim, 8.30 - 10.30AM.
Add. Math with Mr Yong, 10.45 - 12.45AM.

And now, I'm IU Director for my school's Interact club, which reminds me, I have to finish that suggestion paper ay-sap, knowing what ridiculous problems it would bring if I can't finish it on time.

With that, Cik Low had forced persuaded me to go for Queen's Guide, and now I have no idea how to finish up the tons of buku logs and the tests for the badges. Goshness. Really have to crack my head for this one.

Did I also mention I have now homework for approximately 12 subjects, and assignments and projects for SPM next year is still not counted in here for the time being?

Oh yeah, I have to come up with something for the school magazine too.

Wait, there's debate at school level and national level to get over with.

I can only pray NONE of the activities that I'm involved in or mentioned above do not ever clash.

Form Four is really one heck of a busy year.

*****Biology tuition today is fun. Which is just about the only nice thing about today I guess.

Maybe besides seeing Jasmine and family at the same bookshop that I was in to get the reference books for two years' worth. Phew =)

Ah Yuan is a very nice seat mate! XD

Seeing Hamsha and Geetha today was also great! Familiar faces in tuition always rocks ;D

Erica and Sharlyn are in the same slot for Rohaini with me. AWESOME company! Hopefully they'll stay in the same class as me, for they want a different slot, the current class is too full to be true. Sigh.

New girl in school called Stephanie. She's pretty nice to talk to :) And to sum it off, to another individual if she's reading my blog, I do not judge anybody by rumours till I get to know her for myself. So there!

*****Fiona HATES me. Boohoo =P

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I looked away
then I look back at you,
You try to say
the things that you can't undo,
If I had my way
I'd never get over you,
Today's the day
I pray that we make it through.

Make it through the fall,
Make it through it all.

"And I don't wanna fall to pieces
I just wanna sit and stare at you.
I don't wanna talk about it
And I don't want a conversation
I just wanna cry in front of you.
I don't wanna talk about it
'Cause I'm in love with you."

You're the only one
I'd be with till the end.
When I come undone
you bring me back again.
Back under the stars,
Back into your arms.

-Fall to Pieces, Avril Lavigne.-

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And supermodel here refers to the one and only Karyn Ong! =P

She tagged me twice already, so I'll finish them off right now before I get busy with school's crazy activities again. We are talking about SIGS here alright. Eheh.

Tag One.
This is apparently a tag to express your current mood, according to Miss Karyn's post? Ahahahah.

01. 1 a.m: Tossed and turned in bed.
02. I love it when: I can just lie down on the field and stare up into the sky in school during PE lessons.
03. Karl Lagerfeld is: Someone I just Googled up. He's actually a very famous fashion designer? I honestly didn't know till about, five seconds ago. Lol.
04. Tomorrow: Is another school day which I can expect more homework and various tasks from the school teachers.
05. I have to confess: I miss my single life. In a way.
06. If I had one million dollars I would: Save, donate, and spend on my friends, family and myself. I would love to travel around the world with a million dollars. Hahah.
07. The future: Is going to be smoking hot.
08. Maybe I should: Stop being so sensitive about what other people think of me.
09. I am tagging: Dee dearie! And my Green Cheese, so she has something to update her blog about after being MIA since she went to India! =D

Tag Two.
1. Take a recent picture of yourself or take a picture right now.
2. Don’t change your clothes, just take a picture.
3. Post that picture with NO editing.
4. Post the picture with these instructions :

Instructions :
#Remove one question from below and add in your personal question.
#Make a total of 20 questions and tag 5 people.
#List them out at the end of the post.
#Notify them in their cbox / shoutmix that they've been tagged.

Very recent. Taken on the 30th of December 2008 :)
That's my signature face people! XD
1. What’s your ambition?
To be registered into an asylum for the mentally retarded. Kidding. A psychologist hopefully.

2. What do you like the most about your siblings?
That's for me to know and for my elder bro to find out. Eheh.

3. Are you looking for a boyfriend?
I'm already taken.

4. Do you think you have enough confidence?
Not enough. Still on the way of improving on that factor.

5. How many babies you want?
None. Never thought of marriage yet, so with the question related to this issue, my answer is none for the time being.

6. Are you satisfied with what you have right now, at this very moment?
Yahuh. Life is pretty fulfilling - for now.

7. What is your goal for this year (2009)?
Try to survive in Science stream, get better grades, survive the journey in getting Queen's Guide. Stay friends with everybody I know now, keep in contact with all the RYLA-rians. Oh yeah, improve on those debating skills and stay alive in tuition.

8. Do you think you're clever?
Nope. Let's just say I'm just average. There's always room for improvement though.

9.What’s a perfect girlfriend/boyfriend like to you?(list 10)
Not going to answer the question here, as I sort of already have a Mr Perfect.

10. Do you ever wonder where you would end up after you die?
It did cross my mind once in awhile, but never put too much thought into it. I'm too busy trying to live life to the fullest now.

11. What are your bad habits?
Not thinking before I speak, procrastinate much, oversensitiveness, short-tempered at the wrong times.

12. Do you love shopping?
Depends. But always it depends on the duckets' issue. No duckets, no mood to shop. It's a fact here people!

13. State a random fact about yourself?
I had not yet read even the first book of Twilight which everyone seems to be crazy about nor watched the movie.

14. What does flying means to you?
When I fall off the bed while dreaming that I was falling in mid-flight during sleep time. Personally, it also means being in a certain individual's arms, knowing that I'll never fall from this flight. This certain individual may not be who you think it might be, readers.

15. What do you crave for the most currently?
Oreo McFlurry. Nah, I crave for the holidays, screaming out loud at the beach in Labuan with my dirrrty dancers, and for March to come as quickly as possible.

16. Describe the person that tagged you in 7 words.
Seven words? Let's see. She's my supermodel! ;)

17. Are you currently single?
I did say I was already taken, wasn't I?

18.What is in your mind now?
The desktop that can just go fly kites or gigabytes as it had to interrupt a very much heartfelt conversation on MSN.

19. Do you believe in fate?
Sometimes.

20. Who do you want to be 10 years later?
Who you say? I want to stay being myself, as a successful career woman hopefully, without being looked down upon like what happened in Civics class today. She's bullshit. Really.

I tag : Dee! Gee! Chris! Veena! Rebecca!

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..as a fourth former! Woohoo.

Yeah, right.

I'm looking forward to learn all these new subjects and all, what more with being in Interact and planning IU Day, playing more cak too, going for more school trips with friends and hopefully be more involved in debate and the school's editorial board.

2009 better be a rockin' year for school.

What more with tuition, homework, assignments, and handling everything at one go.

Hopefully I won't get mad by the end of the week or something.

Have fun for the first day of school everyone!

Those that are still studying anyway.

Till the next post, full of Miss Karyn Ong's tags, cheerio!

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Quote of the day :
"Learn to expect the unexpected."
Personal quote for 2009? Maybe.

The starting of the new year had brought many unexpectations that I would had never dreamed or ever thought of in my whole 15 years 8 months and 12 days living on Planet Earth.

Through RYLA all the way back in December 2008, it was just like yesterday that I was finally discovering the real me - with the help of the awesome friends I made there, the new people I had known there, and gaining a wider perspective on a variety of issues, whether personal or in general.

All of them, in one way or another, made a huge impact in my after RYLA life.

And after going through the mere beginning of post-RYLA life, it just struck me that I, what I used to think of myself as an average teenager who just like any other, wants to have friends and family who loves her, excel in her studies, and similar bullshit - had actually made impacts of similar levels to two different individuals.

One of them apparently stopped a really bad habit after I'd appeared in said person's world. Said person also said that me turning up in said person's life had changed everything for the better. I care for this person, I really do. Because of this individual, I thought that I finally felt cared for and loved for the first time. 'Cos after another friend that I used to be real close with totally broke my heart, I could swear that from that second in life, my heart had totally stoned - for good. It took me three years to recover from that heartbreak, I thought I can finally move on from my previous disappointment and see things in a more positive light as last.

But here comes the other individual that I had made a huge impact on said individual's life. Honestly, I never would had thought that this person would know of my existence at all, adding the fact that we had never even had eye contact throughout those few times we actually were at the same place at the same moment. But since then, everything that happened to us seemed so fast. Once again I felt loved for, that there's actually people that do care for me that way, but I had already chose to commit to a whole new experience. What I still can't believe is how much this person thinks so highly of me, and is still willing to wait, knowing the consequences and such.

I literally teared up after reading a testimonial that I can definitely relate to.

The weird thing is - I just couldn't cry.

Tears welled up in my eyes, no matter how hard I tried crying, to release all those pent up emotions, those tears just stayed there, refusing to budge.

Note that I am not trying to be poetic, nor trying to brag that my mere existence had changed a few homosapiens' lives.

All the recent happenings just made me officially dumbfounded.

I thought I could control my emotions stupendously well since my heart stoned and all.

Apparently, I'm still not good enough.

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I finally watched The House Bunny yesterday.
It's not one of the best movies of 2008 maybe, but it's really bimbotic enough to entertain me - what with man holes and avoiding sharp corners while wearing water bras and highlighting the eyes with makeup is so important because apparently the eyes are the nipples of the face.

One of my favourite scenes has to be this :

After the crazy makeovers and they all start flaunting their newfound beauty, as they call it. Ahahahahahah.
Entertaining indeed.

*****I also made a trip to the dentist yesterday.

My very nice new dentist told me during the checkup that if I ever were to get braces, it would be mainly for hygiene purposes, as decay is more likely to happen with my current teeth structure. Don't ask me how. There's a long explanation to this, but I'm not going to bother everyone with that.

So, with that, he started going through all the details with me.

If I was interested to get braces, he would be more than happy to arrange the procedures and if so, I have to go to two different places other than his for treatment - one for extracting FOUR teeth and another to take TWO x-rays of the skull to clearly plan out how am I going to get my braces done.

If I wasn't, then all I have to do is floss more regularly and make sure I go to the dentist every six months and all that.

Before I was given option two, my dentist told me in his usual tone that if I don't want braces, I can always choose to have all of my teeth extracted, and he can do a set of dentures for me.

All I remembered was staring blankly at his face.

And he can just say he was just joking, then laugh his head off.

I'm totally agreeing with my brother, he's a much better and professional dentist compared to the previous one that's totally insane and full of himself, just that this new dentist tells very sadistic jokes.

So, the point is..

"To get braces or not to get braces?"
*Picture credits goes to SilverMirroredMoon.

***** Random, but I was told I'm going to be blacklisted in Omega if I'm late for my Biology tuition one more time.

Sheesh, something nice to start the year with.

But in any case, I'm happy to announce that Ng Ah Yuan is in the same Bio class as me!

And it's decided that Ah Yuan and Ah-Nie are sitting together for the next lesson, maybe the whole year!

We'll see about that :)

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A.C. - what in the world can that stand for?

Alternating Current?

Air-Conditioner?

AC/DC the Aussie band?

In fact, I never knew either.

Till I was told that it actually stands for something very simple.

Act or Acting Cute.

In relation to this topic, Picasso aka my Mr Cankien* called me a few days before and he mentioned a few issues.

Firstly, he was talking about how I always do the same face expression in every single photo that I'm in during RYLA, on how he describes it - "The mouth always goes to one side with one eye closed and the other open." Something to that point.

Example of Leonie's signature expression is as shown above. Next to me is Picasso himself! =D
Then he said I was very tomboyish.

I didn't mind that, really. In fact, I find it a compliment instead!

But Picasso said that I was actually very cute, and I should be more girly to show off the feminine side in me and let the cuteness in me shine!

I was very dumbfounded at that point, so all I could do at that moment was to ask him how.

And he replied, and I quote,

"You know the 1, 2, 5? Do that then can dy lor.
So I gave it some thought, and decided to give that formula a shot.

Just to let Picasso know that I tried, but honestly, the cute look is just not for me! Heheh (:

NOTE :
ANY FORM OF LALANESS IS NOT INTENDED - FOR THE FOLLOWING PICTURES ARE ONLY MEANT TO BE EXPERIMENTAL AND NOTHING ELSE. IF YOU ARE OR WILL BE OFFENDED, KINDLY STOP READING AT THIS POINT AND DO NOT SUE ME IF YOU ACCIDENTALLY DID. YOUR COOPERATION IS HIGHLY APPRECIATED.
'1'
The Piggie Syndrome.

'2'
The Sulking Double-Horned Devil.

'5'
An Oath to be a 'Patriotic' Citizen.
And an extra addition..

'7'
Suicidal Moment.
See Picasso? Just let me continue doing my usual one-eye-closed-and-crooked-mouth-face in photos x]

*Picasso is now also known as my Mr Cankien if I didn't get the spelling wrong again and I'm his Miss CanCan. Goodness, Picasso is really creative with how he came up with these names. The history behind it is actually concerning dialects! Ahahahah! XD

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HAPPY 2009 READERS!
For the very first entry of the year, I shall dedicate this to the sayang that made the New Year real memorable for me - for reasons only he and I know :)

A lil' surprise feature for my Farhan sayang aka Farhana and my Mr Sayang! ;)
Okay, the story behind how I got to know this RYLA-rian better was unfortunately AFTER RYLA '08 ended. 'Cos apparently Farhan here was too shy to approach me and say hi! As if I wasn't, so we didn't talk at all during camp! Sadnessity indeed! D=

I'd noticed this dude by his cool headgear at first actually! Let me show you a fantastic example of what I mean :

See the most outstanding dude with the cool headgear? That's him alright! :D
The next thing that made me noticed him was Farhan sayang being the flag bearer for Team Phoenix!

Tadah! xD
And the final event that made me notice him! Introducing..*drum rolls*

Farhan, or rather his hawt sexy alter ego Farhana being judged on Talent Night during RYLA! That was the last straw, I can seriously remember myself recording the whole performance, and my fangirl-like screams were also recorded along with it xD
Then, I was dragged into the many multiple conversations on MSN with I don't know how many RYLA-rians, which Sean here had said to me was a RYLA tradition, lol. I added Farhan then, or was it him that added me first, and since then we started talking. A LOT! x]

He's a really cool dude who's another that throws me loads of compliments and flattery till I need a fridge to store me. Ahahahah! XD

We also added each other on Facebook, him being well-known for his profile picture as shown above and me spamming his wall! =P

And since we always use the term sayang among us, he decided to call himself my Mr Sayang!

With that after he edited his then display picture on MSN, I was inspired to do something for him after he did a lot of nice things for me. Heheh.




The pictures say it all, don't they? (;
So, with that I would like to conclude that I hope Mr Sayang will be my Mr Sayang as long as time allows it for he is the nicest Mr Sayang anyone can get! Especially a very weird and unpredictable human like me. Hee.


PS : To my Mr Perfect, please do not be jealous nor insecure once you read this post. You know that you can trust me, like I told you so many times that you can, and always could. Things between us will work out, I can promise you that.

And to Mr Sayang too!

All pictures of Farhan sayang belong to him, so credits for the pictures to my sayang!

*****Karyn and Christina tagged me! Will do ay-sap! :]

*****Did the countdown with my fellow RYLA-rians - Fiona, Picasso, Rachel, Karyn, Julian, and of course Farhan sayang! This is one countdown I'll never forget, for it's the first time I was involved in an MSN countdown, what more with the beloved RYLA-rians, and with company at least! My family never really celebrated the coming in of the new year, hahah.

We even had a post-new year game, where all of us did a confessions' session, with Kim and Cai Ling joining in! Eheh.

I have no idea what happened after that, but it was fun while we're at it =D

By the way, all information revealed will not be exposed outside the conversation window ever again! =P

What more with Mr Sayang making it all the even more memorable for me ;)

Something tells me the New Year is going to be AWESOME! XD

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It’s not an English name I came up with for myself. My mother is indeed a genius in coming up with such a splendid name for me. Although my name has been unfortunately mutilated (nicknames are excluded) over the past years, full credits to my mum for my current identity.

I’m certainly looking forward to changing the word ‘patient’ to ‘survivor’! If you’re interested to read about my journey in battling lymphoma, you can click here to proceed to my cancer blog.

Ironic, I know; this blog is mainly pink instead. I like all colours actually, but I find myself having an affinity to the colour green. In fact, I can safely say that green is my soul colour.

Languages, music, fashion, photography, cultures, dance, literature, writing; just about anything, really. The arts truly intrigue me, especially thought-provoking pieces. Of course, the arts play a major role in inspiring me in my everyday life.

I don’t have a favourite genre – I read any book that interests me!

I am a trained right-hander from young, since apparently being left-handed is considered ‘wrong’. Basically, I’m ambidextrous! No wonder I find it easier to air guitar using my left hand than my right; I simply relate to the arts than subjects that deal with logical thinking better, too.

A stubborn Bull I am, too. I abhor being rushed. I prefer doing matters at my own reasonable pace. I don’t particularly like changes in my routine, but I can adapt quite easily. I’m a very practical person as well. I enjoy the beautiful things in life, but that doesn’t make me shun ugliness at all. Besides, it all depends on how one perceives beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

Still am, but I’m slowly learning to accept imperfection into my life. Also, I’m doing my best to erase the many expectations I have so I could one day master the art of letting go and freeing myself to simple happiness and joy.

Compared to before, I’m less dramatic nowadays. Language-wise, I attempt to blog flawlessly in English and speak proper English online with my peers. Call me a Grammar Nazi all you want, but that’s how I roll. I only converse in perfect English in formal situations and during my dramatic outbursts. Otherwise, I’m absolutely capable of communicating like the average Malaysian!

It’s a different issue altogether when you’re forced to learn for the sake of getting good grades, though. Other than that, I’m open to new information and knowledge anytime! I especially would like to learn more languages and pick up new musical instruments.

…are just some of the things I would love to do in the near future, hopefully!

the basic rules apply. If you respect me, I’ll respect you. If you happen to be someone who has low EQ skills, I’ll try to be tolerant but my patience is definitely limited. I’m observant when it comes to human behaviour. I’m a person of many opinions, but I don’t voice them out unless I trust you enough; I’m very honest and candid when it comes to the people I can trust. Even though I trust very easily, not everybody can prove that they’re all that nice. Hurt me, and I’ll only defend myself if necessary. Hurt my family or my friends – you won’t find me holding back.

Is there anything else you would like to know about me?
Throw me your questions and/or doubts here! I honestly have nothing to hide, so you’ll expect the truth and nothing but the truth.

It’s only how I phrase my answers that you’ll have to be aware of.
Or…you can click hereto go back to reading!

I'm still loaded with homework and can't concentrate on coding my new blogskin now as I know that schoolwork awaits me.

Tuition work too.

So, my codes are all messed up and I'm a very unhappy and angry monster now.


Will update once I managed to get it all done and over with, and that also means once my new blogskin is done.

Hopefully.

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As usual, I'm going to Melaka again like every other year during CNY to celebrate the festivities with my family (:

This time round, I'm going there with my some relatives and cousins, so this should be a different experience.

Yeah, different indeed. 'Cos I intend to bring my books there to try to work on my homework and study for the upcoming test. I'm really behind in my studies due to me falling asleep in class and tuition.

A LOT.

I'll be leaving tomorrow and will be back on Thursday!

Till the next post, xoxo to all!

PS : I'm working on my new blogskin (:

PS2 : Veena is now officially known as HOTWIND people! Don't kill me Vee, Cassandran made me do this! =P

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Happy Chi-yuh-nese New Year to all those that celebrates it!
It's the Year of the Ox and my only resolution for the new year..

Stay alive,
and keep sane.
Cheers to all and have a merry holiday while you still can!

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"Caged."
Trapped within my own feelings?
Yes I definitely am.

This blog can only do this much as a source to channel all the pent-up emotions from the daily life of yours truly.

But my blog is also public, therefore I still have to be careful of what I write down here.

As of this year, do I only know that my presence make such a huge impact on some people.

It's quite an ah-mazing discovery for an insignificant homosapien like moi.

But ironically, I rather stay as that insignificant human with a drama-less life then have all of this hitting me at one go.

So, to these two humans that told me that my appearance in their lives had made such an impact on them, I have something to say.

Something that I can't bear to say directly to the both of you, for I really do not want you both to feel hurt, as if I really did made such a huge impact in your lives as you both apparently say, I might be charged the following day as a suspect involved in a suicide case.

I have a whole life in front of me, and I don't want anybody dead over mere little me, so here it is.

To You.
The moment we met we never agreed on anything.
And finally when we started getting closer and all, you changed into someone nicer.
Too nice if I might say.
I know, I sound too much,
as in why am I even bothered to rant about someone being nicer to me,
'cos ain't that supposed to be a good thing?
But the problem is, you changed because of me, and frankly,
I'm not used to the new you.
Maybe that is why I told you to give me a break,
to sort out my thoughts and emotions.
I was friends with you for the fact that we had so much to talk about and exchange our opinions on,
and the next moment you were all sweet words,
and going on and on about how perfect I am and such.
I'm sorry, maybe you didn't do anything wrong and any normal teen girl would had been squealing in pure delight with your words,
but this is me.
I'm very practical and I just got really disgusted with what you often said to me.
All that stuff which you added the word forever in,
I was actually thinking back on how long this would last.
I don't think this can work out anymore,
so I advise you to move on,
and I'm sorry.
It's not because of him I'm doing all this,
but I just realized I can't handle this kind of issues yet,
even if I'm as mature in thought as you said I am.

To You.
My biggest mistake to you is to get carried away by your honest feelings,
and I was fazed by everything you said.
Every time I would be asking myself the same thing,
"Is this what I really feel and think about you?
'Cos I think I might be lying to you without realizing it."
Sorry wouldn't be enough to diminish the pain you might go through if you'll ever know it's you I'm talking about.
I'm actually not very impressed at all that you're incorporating me into many aspects of your life,
especially with the fact you said you were inspired by me and the results from that aren't really as great as expected.
I rather you be yourself,
for that's the reason why I liked you as a really good friend in the first place.
I never felt that cared by any individual before,
nor did I ever felt so loved either.
I'm touched by all the things you said to me,
but..
Am I really worth all your time and emotions?
Am I worth being the subject of your poems and songs that you composed?
Am I worth the wait?
'Cos honestly, I don't think I deserve you.
I'm too practical, emotionless and selfish to deserve this attention from you.
Telling this to your face would kill you inside,
'cos I truly know you're really emotional and sentimental.
And I just couldn't bear to say it to your face.

To the both of you,
I rather if we stayed great close friends.
It's because of the both of you,
that I'm not so sure of my original principles in life anymore.
If I were to speak a truth about this,
is that both of you had made great impacts in my life too.
Sorry is really not enough,
I know.
But I can't live in this lie anymore.
And I can't go on knowing that I'm just lying to the both of you.
I got carried away,
to put it rudely to myself,
I think I might actually had played with both your feelings.
I sound like a bitch saying this.
But,
I would say this again and once more,
openly and publicly on this blog,
that I do not have a crush nor love any guy,
for the time being,
and that's because of another,
he stole from me all prospects of loving another,
and turned my heart into stone.
Thanks to this individual,
now two would have to suffer the consequences.
I don't expect the both of you to forgive me,
and I know it's too much to forget easily.
Please.
All I'm asking for now is some time to get my life organized,
to sort my thoughts out.
And to rethink whether we still can work this out,
whether as friends or to be involved in that emotion with that four lettered word,
called LOVE.

I know this word can't give the same impact as what my doings had did to you both,
but still,
sincerely from the bottom of my stoned heart..

I'm sorry.

For letting you guys get to know and love the pathetic me.

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First of all, the MOST AWESOME thanks to the fellow RYLA-rians - namely..
Picasso aka Mr Cankien,
Fiona aka Little Miss Meanie,
and Farhan sayang!
I managed to finish my Chemistry homework thanks to the links you guys provided me and Fiona with her naming tons of random chemicals for me!
:D
No thanks to Irwin Goh though for calling me pig =.=

Next, MUCHO thanks to everybody that wished me luck and helped me passed my cooking test on Monday with flying colours I should say!
(:
Especially to Min Wen for snapping the pics and reassuring me I won't fail,
Pn Tea for helping me with stuff here and there,
Hazel, Xin Yun and Kat for doing my part of the cleaning up at the cooking room 'cos I had to go back earlier,
and my mumsie for helping me with the preparations!
Coming soon,
Camper's Badge.
Please pray for my success readers!
And for my friends that are doing the test too!

SINCEREST thanks to everybody that told me to chill,
referring to my previous post.
I'll definitely try,
will be hard though.
Trying to settle down into this new lifestyle.
Hopefully, that's soon.
And to Christopher,
we had a deal!
Don't ever forget!
x]

Thanks too to Jamie, Catherine and Angela for letting me confide in them about camp issues.
Apparently they noticed I had a hard time with the last camp,
and apparently, they totally understand what I'm going through.
Gracious, they better be official Queen's Guides later in the year,
bless them all!

And to my dearie Dee,
who totally made my effed up day a whole lot better.
And yes people,
read this well.
She's still the Motherfucking Princess y'all.
MY Motherfucking Princess!
I heart her still (=

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School is currently killing me - what with endless homework, prefect duty even though it's much simpler than last year but I have to miss 10 to 15 minutes of classes after recess, Interact with Miss Nav not being our teacher adviser anymore and IU Day still not really planned, sport practices which is just to oblige the teachers to show how dedicated we are even if some of us really have no athletic talent namely yours truly, extra classes like Music and Japanese with me having to take Music as an extra subject in SPM and going for some national level Japanese exam in KL this year end, new subjects in Form 4 that have so much to understand and memorize but so little time, incoming assignments on miscellaneous tasks, staying back till so late just to fulfill the PNP thingamajig, and now the next reason for more white hair - taking up Queen's Guide for real, trying to finish up the buku logs, what with my Kelas Dua nowhere near done yet, having to start on Tali Pekelilingan earlier than the previous batch, us being the last batch under Cik Low who will definitely want us to be her best yet, going broke to prepare for I-don't-know-how-many-tests which involves loads of camping, cooking, photo-developing, and buying more test pads for buku logs. Tell me I'm doomed.

Tuition is being a drag, especially after school. I have Biology, Chemistry, Physics, Add. Math and BM for the time being, but I have homework from all these too. And I'm expected to finish them. Not even Pn Rohaini will let me off now for not doing my essays now!

Piano lessons are still on hold, the original plan of completing Grade 8 before SPM seems so bleak now. My only option of a part-time job as a piano teacher after SPM is going down, since my mum objects to every other part-time job out there that's available.

Have to find a new club for sports. It's now either joining the Chess Club or if I really can, Archery. But for Archery it's only limited to those that can really play and represent the school as the main team, but seriously, sounds like something I still have a chance at doing rather than the Gymnast Club which I had been a not so active member for the past three years. Evonne would completely get what I'm talking about.

Rozi is not helping either. Seriously, she still asks me to do reports for her, find people to do her work for her, and persuade the rest to play Cak or Pacik performances for school events. And with that, she still refuses to let me have a copy of the keys for the Music Room! Honestly, how am I to do certain work if I can't even enter the Music Room which is locked half the time and I still feel bad for having to bug Xin Yun everytime just for the keys!

What's more, I'm trying to survive with Accounts, which I am now currently clueless in. If it's in English, life would be easier for me, since my mum could teach me. But now, she can't understand any of the Malay terms and I lost my only hope for somebody to guide me in Accounts. Yikes? Yeaps indeed.

And then there's debate, IIUM, and other random events that may just pop out of nowhere which makes attendance compulsory. I would love to go, and honestly don't want to sound whiny, but I'm kind of tired from this current lifestyle and I don't even know whether I can spare not going for tuition or skipping school to attend school trips anymore. And if any of the activities clash, it'll be the end of the world for me. Not exaggerating there.

I don't even have time to revise anymore. Oh please, don't let my parents kill me if I fail my first exam. I doubt I can pass anything at this rate.

And you know what?

I'm still trying to stay positive at this point, but I find it so freaking hard.

I'm praying so hard to get used to upper secondary life.

I miss just mucking around after PMR.

I miss RYLA '08, especially fellow RYLA-rians whom I can truly call FRIENDS.

I miss sleeping in during the holidays.

Compared to life now, Form Three was peanuts, and to think that I'd complained so freaking much.

So readers, if there are still any since everyone is back to their own busy lives, if I don't update on a regular basis, it's 'cos I'm still trying to adapt to this culture shock and so-called honeymoon year apparently, bullshit to that human that made that theory up.

This blogger shall not be held responsible for any form of injury or after effects .
In other words,
"Don't Sue Me.
Me Have No Duckets.
Nor A Life."
"Sweet Sixteen."

Pffffffft.

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Quick update.

And I shall hereby list down here the current schedule of my ah-mazingly even more busy life.

Firstly, school lessons officially ends at 2.30PM from Mondays to Thursdays, 12.10 on Fridays. What I have now is as of the following :

Monday : Music classes, 3 - 5.55PM. (starts after 21st February)
Green House Practise, 3 - 5PM.
Tuesday : 2.45 - 4.30PM, Japanese lessons.
Wednesday : Green House Practise, 3 - 5PM.
Thursday : BM with Pn Rohaini, 4 - 6PM.
Friday : Biology with Mr Kung, 2.30 - 4.30PM.
Saturday : Physics with Mr Cham, 2.30 - 4.30PM.
Sunday : Chemistry with Mr Lim, 8.30 - 10.30AM.
Add. Math with Mr Yong, 10.45 - 12.45AM.

And now, I'm IU Director for my school's Interact club, which reminds me, I have to finish that suggestion paper ay-sap, knowing what ridiculous problems it would bring if I can't finish it on time.

With that, Cik Low had forced persuaded me to go for Queen's Guide, and now I have no idea how to finish up the tons of buku logs and the tests for the badges. Goshness. Really have to crack my head for this one.

Did I also mention I have now homework for approximately 12 subjects, and assignments and projects for SPM next year is still not counted in here for the time being?

Oh yeah, I have to come up with something for the school magazine too.

Wait, there's debate at school level and national level to get over with.

I can only pray NONE of the activities that I'm involved in or mentioned above do not ever clash.

Form Four is really one heck of a busy year.

*****Biology tuition today is fun. Which is just about the only nice thing about today I guess.

Maybe besides seeing Jasmine and family at the same bookshop that I was in to get the reference books for two years' worth. Phew =)

Ah Yuan is a very nice seat mate! XD

Seeing Hamsha and Geetha today was also great! Familiar faces in tuition always rocks ;D

Erica and Sharlyn are in the same slot for Rohaini with me. AWESOME company! Hopefully they'll stay in the same class as me, for they want a different slot, the current class is too full to be true. Sigh.

New girl in school called Stephanie. She's pretty nice to talk to :) And to sum it off, to another individual if she's reading my blog, I do not judge anybody by rumours till I get to know her for myself. So there!

*****Fiona HATES me. Boohoo =P

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I looked away
then I look back at you,
You try to say
the things that you can't undo,
If I had my way
I'd never get over you,
Today's the day
I pray that we make it through.

Make it through the fall,
Make it through it all.

"And I don't wanna fall to pieces
I just wanna sit and stare at you.
I don't wanna talk about it
And I don't want a conversation
I just wanna cry in front of you.
I don't wanna talk about it
'Cause I'm in love with you."

You're the only one
I'd be with till the end.
When I come undone
you bring me back again.
Back under the stars,
Back into your arms.

-Fall to Pieces, Avril Lavigne.-

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And supermodel here refers to the one and only Karyn Ong! =P

She tagged me twice already, so I'll finish them off right now before I get busy with school's crazy activities again. We are talking about SIGS here alright. Eheh.

Tag One.
This is apparently a tag to express your current mood, according to Miss Karyn's post? Ahahahah.

01. 1 a.m: Tossed and turned in bed.
02. I love it when: I can just lie down on the field and stare up into the sky in school during PE lessons.
03. Karl Lagerfeld is: Someone I just Googled up. He's actually a very famous fashion designer? I honestly didn't know till about, five seconds ago. Lol.
04. Tomorrow: Is another school day which I can expect more homework and various tasks from the school teachers.
05. I have to confess: I miss my single life. In a way.
06. If I had one million dollars I would: Save, donate, and spend on my friends, family and myself. I would love to travel around the world with a million dollars. Hahah.
07. The future: Is going to be smoking hot.
08. Maybe I should: Stop being so sensitive about what other people think of me.
09. I am tagging: Dee dearie! And my Green Cheese, so she has something to update her blog about after being MIA since she went to India! =D

Tag Two.
1. Take a recent picture of yourself or take a picture right now.
2. Don’t change your clothes, just take a picture.
3. Post that picture with NO editing.
4. Post the picture with these instructions :

Instructions :
#Remove one question from below and add in your personal question.
#Make a total of 20 questions and tag 5 people.
#List them out at the end of the post.
#Notify them in their cbox / shoutmix that they've been tagged.

Very recent. Taken on the 30th of December 2008 :)
That's my signature face people! XD
1. What’s your ambition?
To be registered into an asylum for the mentally retarded. Kidding. A psychologist hopefully.

2. What do you like the most about your siblings?
That's for me to know and for my elder bro to find out. Eheh.

3. Are you looking for a boyfriend?
I'm already taken.

4. Do you think you have enough confidence?
Not enough. Still on the way of improving on that factor.

5. How many babies you want?
None. Never thought of marriage yet, so with the question related to this issue, my answer is none for the time being.

6. Are you satisfied with what you have right now, at this very moment?
Yahuh. Life is pretty fulfilling - for now.

7. What is your goal for this year (2009)?
Try to survive in Science stream, get better grades, survive the journey in getting Queen's Guide. Stay friends with everybody I know now, keep in contact with all the RYLA-rians. Oh yeah, improve on those debating skills and stay alive in tuition.

8. Do you think you're clever?
Nope. Let's just say I'm just average. There's always room for improvement though.

9.What’s a perfect girlfriend/boyfriend like to you?(list 10)
Not going to answer the question here, as I sort of already have a Mr Perfect.

10. Do you ever wonder where you would end up after you die?
It did cross my mind once in awhile, but never put too much thought into it. I'm too busy trying to live life to the fullest now.

11. What are your bad habits?
Not thinking before I speak, procrastinate much, oversensitiveness, short-tempered at the wrong times.

12. Do you love shopping?
Depends. But always it depends on the duckets' issue. No duckets, no mood to shop. It's a fact here people!

13. State a random fact about yourself?
I had not yet read even the first book of Twilight which everyone seems to be crazy about nor watched the movie.

14. What does flying means to you?
When I fall off the bed while dreaming that I was falling in mid-flight during sleep time. Personally, it also means being in a certain individual's arms, knowing that I'll never fall from this flight. This certain individual may not be who you think it might be, readers.

15. What do you crave for the most currently?
Oreo McFlurry. Nah, I crave for the holidays, screaming out loud at the beach in Labuan with my dirrrty dancers, and for March to come as quickly as possible.

16. Describe the person that tagged you in 7 words.
Seven words? Let's see. She's my supermodel! ;)

17. Are you currently single?
I did say I was already taken, wasn't I?

18.What is in your mind now?
The desktop that can just go fly kites or gigabytes as it had to interrupt a very much heartfelt conversation on MSN.

19. Do you believe in fate?
Sometimes.

20. Who do you want to be 10 years later?
Who you say? I want to stay being myself, as a successful career woman hopefully, without being looked down upon like what happened in Civics class today. She's bullshit. Really.

I tag : Dee! Gee! Chris! Veena! Rebecca!

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..as a fourth former! Woohoo.

Yeah, right.

I'm looking forward to learn all these new subjects and all, what more with being in Interact and planning IU Day, playing more cak too, going for more school trips with friends and hopefully be more involved in debate and the school's editorial board.

2009 better be a rockin' year for school.

What more with tuition, homework, assignments, and handling everything at one go.

Hopefully I won't get mad by the end of the week or something.

Have fun for the first day of school everyone!

Those that are still studying anyway.

Till the next post, full of Miss Karyn Ong's tags, cheerio!

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Quote of the day :
"Learn to expect the unexpected."
Personal quote for 2009? Maybe.

The starting of the new year had brought many unexpectations that I would had never dreamed or ever thought of in my whole 15 years 8 months and 12 days living on Planet Earth.

Through RYLA all the way back in December 2008, it was just like yesterday that I was finally discovering the real me - with the help of the awesome friends I made there, the new people I had known there, and gaining a wider perspective on a variety of issues, whether personal or in general.

All of them, in one way or another, made a huge impact in my after RYLA life.

And after going through the mere beginning of post-RYLA life, it just struck me that I, what I used to think of myself as an average teenager who just like any other, wants to have friends and family who loves her, excel in her studies, and similar bullshit - had actually made impacts of similar levels to two different individuals.

One of them apparently stopped a really bad habit after I'd appeared in said person's world. Said person also said that me turning up in said person's life had changed everything for the better. I care for this person, I really do. Because of this individual, I thought that I finally felt cared for and loved for the first time. 'Cos after another friend that I used to be real close with totally broke my heart, I could swear that from that second in life, my heart had totally stoned - for good. It took me three years to recover from that heartbreak, I thought I can finally move on from my previous disappointment and see things in a more positive light as last.

But here comes the other individual that I had made a huge impact on said individual's life. Honestly, I never would had thought that this person would know of my existence at all, adding the fact that we had never even had eye contact throughout those few times we actually were at the same place at the same moment. But since then, everything that happened to us seemed so fast. Once again I felt loved for, that there's actually people that do care for me that way, but I had already chose to commit to a whole new experience. What I still can't believe is how much this person thinks so highly of me, and is still willing to wait, knowing the consequences and such.

I literally teared up after reading a testimonial that I can definitely relate to.

The weird thing is - I just couldn't cry.

Tears welled up in my eyes, no matter how hard I tried crying, to release all those pent up emotions, those tears just stayed there, refusing to budge.

Note that I am not trying to be poetic, nor trying to brag that my mere existence had changed a few homosapiens' lives.

All the recent happenings just made me officially dumbfounded.

I thought I could control my emotions stupendously well since my heart stoned and all.

Apparently, I'm still not good enough.

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I finally watched The House Bunny yesterday.
It's not one of the best movies of 2008 maybe, but it's really bimbotic enough to entertain me - what with man holes and avoiding sharp corners while wearing water bras and highlighting the eyes with makeup is so important because apparently the eyes are the nipples of the face.

One of my favourite scenes has to be this :

After the crazy makeovers and they all start flaunting their newfound beauty, as they call it. Ahahahahahah.
Entertaining indeed.

*****I also made a trip to the dentist yesterday.

My very nice new dentist told me during the checkup that if I ever were to get braces, it would be mainly for hygiene purposes, as decay is more likely to happen with my current teeth structure. Don't ask me how. There's a long explanation to this, but I'm not going to bother everyone with that.

So, with that, he started going through all the details with me.

If I was interested to get braces, he would be more than happy to arrange the procedures and if so, I have to go to two different places other than his for treatment - one for extracting FOUR teeth and another to take TWO x-rays of the skull to clearly plan out how am I going to get my braces done.

If I wasn't, then all I have to do is floss more regularly and make sure I go to the dentist every six months and all that.

Before I was given option two, my dentist told me in his usual tone that if I don't want braces, I can always choose to have all of my teeth extracted, and he can do a set of dentures for me.

All I remembered was staring blankly at his face.

And he can just say he was just joking, then laugh his head off.

I'm totally agreeing with my brother, he's a much better and professional dentist compared to the previous one that's totally insane and full of himself, just that this new dentist tells very sadistic jokes.

So, the point is..

"To get braces or not to get braces?"
*Picture credits goes to SilverMirroredMoon.

***** Random, but I was told I'm going to be blacklisted in Omega if I'm late for my Biology tuition one more time.

Sheesh, something nice to start the year with.

But in any case, I'm happy to announce that Ng Ah Yuan is in the same Bio class as me!

And it's decided that Ah Yuan and Ah-Nie are sitting together for the next lesson, maybe the whole year!

We'll see about that :)

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A.C. - what in the world can that stand for?

Alternating Current?

Air-Conditioner?

AC/DC the Aussie band?

In fact, I never knew either.

Till I was told that it actually stands for something very simple.

Act or Acting Cute.

In relation to this topic, Picasso aka my Mr Cankien* called me a few days before and he mentioned a few issues.

Firstly, he was talking about how I always do the same face expression in every single photo that I'm in during RYLA, on how he describes it - "The mouth always goes to one side with one eye closed and the other open." Something to that point.

Example of Leonie's signature expression is as shown above. Next to me is Picasso himself! =D
Then he said I was very tomboyish.

I didn't mind that, really. In fact, I find it a compliment instead!

But Picasso said that I was actually very cute, and I should be more girly to show off the feminine side in me and let the cuteness in me shine!

I was very dumbfounded at that point, so all I could do at that moment was to ask him how.

And he replied, and I quote,

"You know the 1, 2, 5? Do that then can dy lor.
So I gave it some thought, and decided to give that formula a shot.

Just to let Picasso know that I tried, but honestly, the cute look is just not for me! Heheh (:

NOTE :
ANY FORM OF LALANESS IS NOT INTENDED - FOR THE FOLLOWING PICTURES ARE ONLY MEANT TO BE EXPERIMENTAL AND NOTHING ELSE. IF YOU ARE OR WILL BE OFFENDED, KINDLY STOP READING AT THIS POINT AND DO NOT SUE ME IF YOU ACCIDENTALLY DID. YOUR COOPERATION IS HIGHLY APPRECIATED.
'1'
The Piggie Syndrome.

'2'
The Sulking Double-Horned Devil.

'5'
An Oath to be a 'Patriotic' Citizen.
And an extra addition..

'7'
Suicidal Moment.
See Picasso? Just let me continue doing my usual one-eye-closed-and-crooked-mouth-face in photos x]

*Picasso is now also known as my Mr Cankien if I didn't get the spelling wrong again and I'm his Miss CanCan. Goodness, Picasso is really creative with how he came up with these names. The history behind it is actually concerning dialects! Ahahahah! XD

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HAPPY 2009 READERS!
For the very first entry of the year, I shall dedicate this to the sayang that made the New Year real memorable for me - for reasons only he and I know :)

A lil' surprise feature for my Farhan sayang aka Farhana and my Mr Sayang! ;)
Okay, the story behind how I got to know this RYLA-rian better was unfortunately AFTER RYLA '08 ended. 'Cos apparently Farhan here was too shy to approach me and say hi! As if I wasn't, so we didn't talk at all during camp! Sadnessity indeed! D=

I'd noticed this dude by his cool headgear at first actually! Let me show you a fantastic example of what I mean :

See the most outstanding dude with the cool headgear? That's him alright! :D
The next thing that made me noticed him was Farhan sayang being the flag bearer for Team Phoenix!

Tadah! xD
And the final event that made me notice him! Introducing..*drum rolls*

Farhan, or rather his hawt sexy alter ego Farhana being judged on Talent Night during RYLA! That was the last straw, I can seriously remember myself recording the whole performance, and my fangirl-like screams were also recorded along with it xD
Then, I was dragged into the many multiple conversations on MSN with I don't know how many RYLA-rians, which Sean here had said to me was a RYLA tradition, lol. I added Farhan then, or was it him that added me first, and since then we started talking. A LOT! x]

He's a really cool dude who's another that throws me loads of compliments and flattery till I need a fridge to store me. Ahahahah! XD

We also added each other on Facebook, him being well-known for his profile picture as shown above and me spamming his wall! =P

And since we always use the term sayang among us, he decided to call himself my Mr Sayang!

With that after he edited his then display picture on MSN, I was inspired to do something for him after he did a lot of nice things for me. Heheh.




The pictures say it all, don't they? (;
So, with that I would like to conclude that I hope Mr Sayang will be my Mr Sayang as long as time allows it for he is the nicest Mr Sayang anyone can get! Especially a very weird and unpredictable human like me. Hee.


PS : To my Mr Perfect, please do not be jealous nor insecure once you read this post. You know that you can trust me, like I told you so many times that you can, and always could. Things between us will work out, I can promise you that.

And to Mr Sayang too!

All pictures of Farhan sayang belong to him, so credits for the pictures to my sayang!

*****Karyn and Christina tagged me! Will do ay-sap! :]

*****Did the countdown with my fellow RYLA-rians - Fiona, Picasso, Rachel, Karyn, Julian, and of course Farhan sayang! This is one countdown I'll never forget, for it's the first time I was involved in an MSN countdown, what more with the beloved RYLA-rians, and with company at least! My family never really celebrated the coming in of the new year, hahah.

We even had a post-new year game, where all of us did a confessions' session, with Kim and Cai Ling joining in! Eheh.

I have no idea what happened after that, but it was fun while we're at it =D

By the way, all information revealed will not be exposed outside the conversation window ever again! =P

What more with Mr Sayang making it all the even more memorable for me ;)

Something tells me the New Year is going to be AWESOME! XD

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